deepundergroundpoetry.com
at 5:58 a.m.
so now it seems I’m just like you
all those times I said I stay up too late
i’d never risen with the sun in the mornings
now here I am at fucking 5:58
i’d like to say it’s evening time but
it’s clearly in the early AM
i haven’t had enough coffee
to take the day and slay it
but the sunrise was beautiful today
though I didn’t get much sleep at all
and it’ll more than likely be shitty
at least I can say I chased the dawn
i can’t say I’ll be doing this often
the night was just as fleeting
as somebody’s “baby daddy”
who just got caught cheating
but the new day is so fresh
there’s still dew covering the ground
there’s birds chirping in the distance
it’s such a wonderful sound
and even though I’m still tired
i’m glad I’m not still in the bed
i would’ve missed this whole feeling
and I can sleep when I’m dead
all those times I said I stay up too late
i’d never risen with the sun in the mornings
now here I am at fucking 5:58
i’d like to say it’s evening time but
it’s clearly in the early AM
i haven’t had enough coffee
to take the day and slay it
but the sunrise was beautiful today
though I didn’t get much sleep at all
and it’ll more than likely be shitty
at least I can say I chased the dawn
i can’t say I’ll be doing this often
the night was just as fleeting
as somebody’s “baby daddy”
who just got caught cheating
but the new day is so fresh
there’s still dew covering the ground
there’s birds chirping in the distance
it’s such a wonderful sound
and even though I’m still tired
i’m glad I’m not still in the bed
i would’ve missed this whole feeling
and I can sleep when I’m dead
Author's Note
silly morning ramblings.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 12
reading list entries 0
comments 25
reads 494
Commenting Preference:
The author is looking for friendly feedback.
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 3:14pm
I'm not sure You can blame Poetry or the Deep for sleep deprivation - LOL
I sleep about 3 hrs a day and i see You here every time i either log in or peruse without logging in -- at all hrs of the day and night and wonder....... " What could she be thinking about that interferes with her dreams?! "
The rising of the sun is a gorgeous thing even though it begins its heatwaving. & the Birds!! I love hearing them in the early morn. Dew still on the ground?
Beautiful spill considering You haven't slept yet.
Perhaps a wee nap later?
I sleep about 3 hrs a day and i see You here every time i either log in or peruse without logging in -- at all hrs of the day and night and wonder....... " What could she be thinking about that interferes with her dreams?! "
The rising of the sun is a gorgeous thing even though it begins its heatwaving. & the Birds!! I love hearing them in the early morn. Dew still on the ground?
Beautiful spill considering You haven't slept yet.
Perhaps a wee nap later?
2
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 3:19pm
Haha no I don’t blame the poetry or the deep. I’m just too curious, always thinking. Have a new puppy who’s been keeping me up all hours. The “you” is in reference to those who rise early and write. I’ve turned into one ;) thanks Tallen, always, for the reads and comments!
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 3:25pm
So, You did get more than 3 hrs of sleep, then?
Well maybe Your puppy's energy is indirectly one of Your muses because lately You've been
spilling some awesome stuff
; )
Well maybe Your puppy's energy is indirectly one of Your muses because lately You've been
spilling some awesome stuff
; )
0
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 5:28pm
Excellent piece
really enjoy your spills Liv!👏👏
The ending is quite spectacular,
"and even though I’m still tired
i’m glad I’m not still in the bed
i would’ve missed this whole feeling
and I can sleep when I’m dead"
Yes indeed!! I felt this deeply
Great stuff as always 👏👏
really enjoy your spills Liv!👏👏
The ending is quite spectacular,
"and even though I’m still tired
i’m glad I’m not still in the bed
i would’ve missed this whole feeling
and I can sleep when I’m dead"
Yes indeed!! I felt this deeply
Great stuff as always 👏👏
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 9:59pm
Hunter, you always “psych” me up! Thanks for the kind words, and dropping in for a read! ❤️
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
Anonymous
11th Jul 2019 6:52pm
I always have to giggle when night owls are up early and see the sun rise. As a morning person, I see it pretty much every day. Glorious, isn't it? Beautiful poetry here :-)
1
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 9:28pm
Mornings are beautiful but, like you, I am rarely lucid at that time of day. Based on this fun passage:
"i haven’t had enough coffee
to take the day and slay it"
I'd like to see what your like with coffee in ya.
Intriguing metaphor this:
"fleeting
as somebody’s “baby daddy”
who just got caught cheating"
You have a unique, refreshing style.
"i haven’t had enough coffee
to take the day and slay it"
I'd like to see what your like with coffee in ya.
Intriguing metaphor this:
"fleeting
as somebody’s “baby daddy”
who just got caught cheating"
You have a unique, refreshing style.
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 10:01pm
Hahaha, yeah I hadn’t had coffee long in me before that metaphor came rushing out! Quite unfiltered. Thank you for the kind words, Gahddess! And for dropping in for a read and comment❤️
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
11th Jul 2019 10:25pm
Yesss fucking brilliant girl, could be I am HIGH beyond fucking spackered, but that had me smiling start to finish.. Tips hat Liv
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
12th Jul 2019 1:05pm
Thanks Carpe! I’m glad your high ass enjoyed it! :) thanks for the read and comment, dear!
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
Yep, you're right, plenty of time to sleep when you're dead cos we're a long time dead, I once heard.
0
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
12th Jul 2019 1:06pm
Less time than when we’re alive at least. I’m awake again! Earlier than I’d had wanted haha so guess I’ll have to wait til I’m dead.
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
12th Jul 2019 1:41pm
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
12th Jul 2019 9:28am
When on normal schedule Ive been getting up before dawn since 1991 ... Definitely stuff you're missing when sleeping late ... nice write ... Bless and love ...
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
12th Jul 2019 1:09pm
I know, Alan, luv. But I don’t go to bed early enough to wake up before dawn. That’s longer than I’ve been alive.
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
Anonymous
13th Jul 2019 2:22am
You have covered all contingencies and delivered just the right level of narrative strength....you resisted the temptation to be overly explicit...that allows the reader to adopt some of your thoughts for some self-imagineering! Good piece!
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
13th Jul 2019 2:29am
Thank you for this comment, Bobby! I like that you laid that all out :) thanks for stopping in and giving feedback! It’s much appreciated❤️
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
Anonymous
13th Jul 2019 2:54am
Sometimes, an “I like that” comment is enough…but sometimes a “Why I like that” is called for, don’t you agree? The perpetual “stroking” of the poet is sorta like forever foreplay; it leaves a need for more substantive action. (I know, it’s a shitty analogy)…I’m trying to say that your work (imho) deserves more analysis (now and then). That’s what “reviews”/"comments" are about, no? (Or, I could be wrong). LOL
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
13th Jul 2019 3:41am
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
13th Jul 2019 6:14am
Really like the flow of this one. Me being a creature of the night I get the visual. Reminded me of a great song about being up early in the morning, 25 or 6 to 4 by Chicago.
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
13th Jul 2019 2:12pm
Thank you Stanhoven, I’m glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for the read and comment!
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
Anonymous
13th Jul 2019 7:29am
sweet silly ramblings.
Read at 2:28am, here.
Read at 2:28am, here.
1
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
13th Jul 2019 2:14pm
Re. at 5:58 a.m.
18th Jul 2019 7:16am
Re: Re. at 5:58 a.m.
18th Jul 2019 12:20pm
Aww thanks jen! I’ve been working on that! Thanks so much for stopping in to read and comment❤️