Silly Games

I am part of the ocean today
and it's a mystery
to everyone but me
to see the "uncharacteristic" behaviour  
I present
with my lack of presence.
 
In my own company I can drink all day,
smoke away the last of my right lung
and move on to the left
or maybe I can make prank phone calls
and fall asleep at ten am  
not before. I'm playing silly games
 
with myself. A long hot bath may create
some strength but that's only if I can move the length
of the hall to the bathtub
to fill it up
and that seems unlikely.  
 
I am unconcerned when the phone rings
and you spout another rant of how you can't move on
from him but I am just a friend,
there's only so much weight you can add
to a slender frame...unfortunately
I need some time to play a silly game with myself.