deepundergroundpoetry.com

To Hold onto

Lost without a solid kind of love
Solid love is the kind you need to hold onto, attach your self to
In order to feel alive and whole
Love that's solid, I'm yearning for it every second I breathe.
I forget to breathe right, my spinning mind won't stop whining without it
Quick gasps for air inbetween, days,weeks, months.
I'm left questioning what's my purpose without the feeling?  
I'm left questioning my lack of clarity that I should have had already.  
I'm falling out of love, I want to cry.  
My whispering confusion haunts me,
Becon' s me through strangers, I don't own
Who spell out dissappointment, despair
Strangers who pass by me shuffling around me like a deck of cards
Why are they all there only to name my troubles, play with my fears.  
Strangers who unexpectedly moan and groan out at me.
I didn't ask them to mirror my every insecurity!
Stop! Stop! I want to scream at everyone
I struggle to ignore them lurking in my grief
Strangers who try to baracade me away from my troubles
But it doesn't help, only makes it worse
Strangers who take in my strengths  
Who celebrate it only for a moment  
But then send me back to my suffering pain cause it wasn't theirs to hold onto.
Written by Aptsky (Saira Audrey Furner)
Published | Edited 16th Jun 2019
Author's Note
This poem is about being addicted to the feeling of being in love and the constant need you have to experience the feeling and how without it you feel lost or without purpose and how your loss and sad emotion gets twisted and reflected back through strangers you run into on the street who show you negative or positive images of yourself and how upsetting this can be.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 1 reading list entries 0
comments 1 reads 361
Commenting Preference: 
The author is looking for friendly feedback.

Latest Forum Discussions
SPEAKEASY
Yesterday 11:20pm by Ahavati
SPEAKEASY
Yesterday 11:19pm by Ahavati
POETRY
Yesterday 11:05pm by Grace
COMPETITIONS
Yesterday 9:37pm by Kinkwizard_95
SPEAKEASY
Yesterday 6:23pm by Liziantus-Marantus
COMPETITIONS
Yesterday 5:25pm by ajay