deepundergroundpoetry.com

A Love Letter

"A love letter to the only one who can really get me off, an ode to her, to revel in my supreme appreciation for the dark enduring gifts she gave me.. "As a man tortured to the brink of madness by my own philisophical compulsions, knowing that the solution lies not just in my own hands, but in the very fear I have that makes me unable to embrace  the deliverance  I seek.

To the end that my life revolves around  the answer to one very simple question.  The addiction however, is not in the endorphins, but in the pain itself. The darkness does not cause me dispair, to the contrary, I seek out that darkness in her, finding comfort in the demons there.
Knowing that it is just a race that will end just as absurdly as it began.

So let me have your darkness, let me have your pain, because I find it intoxicating pushed directly io my veins., Whispers pushing me, carrying me to the edge, then ulling me back fingers to bone. I love you but I hate you and I want to give you relief with the same stroke that I deliver mine,but I won't let you go that easy, because if I have to suffer then you have to suffer too, but if you'll suffer for me I'll suffer for you, and though we'll never know peace or even the strength to be kind to ourselves, knowing the darkness you known in mine, nurturing the emptiness with futile attempts to feel, to feel anything, my God to feel anything at all beyond this darkness,  it isn't much, but it is our place and as long as you have the courage to push these limits with me, I will claim you, you are mine and though I'll cry I will not be angry when you go, just as long you embrace me, comfort with your darkness, reaussring me of final peace as I go.

And though I am sure to the outside these things just seem like hysterical ramblings, but you and I know different, know that this dysfunction was not our fault, but is our dysfunction, it is dysfunctional, but it is ours and together, for one night of what I could never describe in words let's us know that though we are alone we are not alone.   And though your love was fleeting, it is the only love I wanted and I'm left frustrated without it, but so humble by your beauty and so thankful for your pain"
Written by Rhidle (Roger)
Published
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