For a few seconds

For a few seconds
You think it will never happen
You lie across his lap
Comfortable and safe
Waiting for the first impact
The pain begins
surprising at first
Not as bad as expected
Wrong-escalating rapidly

For a few minutes
You struggle, laughing,
but he is bigger and stronger
And keeps you in place
Never interrupting the rhythm
Of the sharp stinging blows
Finally he stops and the tears flow
He says soothing words
And gently examines his handiwork
Planning the next attack

For a few hours
you think it wasn’t so bad
But when your hands touch your bottom
You can feel the welts
Long raised stripes
Twinges of pain
Over the geography of your southern hemispheres
Two small wet spots where the strap broke the skin
He applied antibiotic ointment to those
And told you to wash and reapply daily to prevent infection

For a few days you are unsure
That it really happened
As you go back to your daily routine
Vaguely disoriented
But whenever you sit down
Or shift in your chair
You are reminded by the dull aching
That it did happen
And when you look n the mirror
You see the bruises
Fading from day to day
You feel sadness as they disappear

For the rest of the week
You think you’ll never go back again
The struggle is always there
Beneath the surface
But in your heart
You know you will
As you always do
Arriving on time

Feeling anxious
And exhilarated
Wanting it so badly
Needing it

For the rest of your life