Dialogue with my shadow

I hate myself,
And I don’t want to live.
I can’t find the courage,
To try and forgive.

Just breathe

But my mind’s full of fog,
And I can’t seem to focus.
Or deal with bad thoughts,
It all seems so hopeless.

Just breathe

So please can you tell me
What difference it makes,
If everything I do
Turns into a mistake?

Just breathe

It’s not that simple,
My life is a mess.
If only you’d know,
The things I should confess.

Just breathe

But I hurt so many people,
How will this fix their pain?
I don’t deserve peace,
Since I’m the one to blame.

Just breathe

I lie, steal and use them,
Do you hear my words?
And yet you tell me to breathe,
This is getting absurd.

Just breathe

I don’t see how breathing,
Makes me a good human.
I think to improve,
There needs to be movement.

Just breathe

Although there is something,
I cannot deny.
Loathing myself
Makes me bitter inside.

Just breathe

How can I make love,
If my mind is so sad?
Maybe there is no point,
In dwelling in the past.

Just breathe

Maybe if I
Will let it all go,
My mind will get space
To finally grow.

Just breathe

I think you are right,
It all ain’t that bad.
These toxic ideas,
Are just in my head.

Just breathe

Then the image of me
As a monster can fade,
And I will be able
To love and not hate.

If I just breathe
I can set myself free
Now I know that the key
Is to simply just be