Memory Sandwich

There's a memory sandwich    
at the back of my brain
crammed with tears    
and oozing heartbreak filling    
      
I take a small, reflective nibble    
before reality rushes in
a squashed jellyfish    
washed on the beach
wiggling its taste of despair    
round every corner of my mouth
the pain of ten toes stinging
    
Louder than the crickets    
the babies cried till dawn
craving momma's hush
they'd never hear again
One cry feeding the next,
my own guilty sheets
now neatly folded a world away
sweetly scented and tucked up safe
from death's cheap lullaby
and the hiss of bullets singing    
 
As the blood spurts back to the earth  
tiny lives trickle
into shallow ditch graves
Stains are washed from machetes
souls are wasted to feed the flies
while more innocents are born    
in the wrong place    
at the wrong time
to the wrong tribe  
  
Fresh tears burn cold shame
because nothing changes, nor ever will
some things never grow stale
those memories always embedded
ready to eat me alive  
in that dead old sandwich
I don't dare to throw away