Noodlewang & The Yoga Pants

You may have seen noodlewang
exiting the gym, sucking down
his low-fat, carb-free protein shake
combating those post-lift shivers

enter yoga pants from the left
with a vegan, breadless, green-filled wrap
stuffed with a zero-calorie alternative to food
resembling something I saw on the floor
of my kid Sisterís bunny cage.

If youíre lucky enough, yoga pants
will look noodlewang up and down
long enough to flick her hair suggestively,
adjusting her sports bra so she shimmers

noodlewang will rally a smile
strategically moving his gym bag
to hide the very obvious fact
dead-lifts made his manhood
retract inside itself.

Thereís nothing they can do
except repeat it all tomorrow,
gazing awkwardly across weights,
banana in hand, shorts realigned.

Strangest mating rituaI I ever saw.
Written by 24601 (John Brady)
Author's Note
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 8 reading list entries 2
comments 9 reads 96
Jade-Pandora Josh
Commenting Preference: 
The author encourages honest critique.

Latest Forum Discussions
Today 1:20am by the5thRiddler
25th August 2019 00:57am by the5thRiddler
24th August 2019 11:19pm by the5thRiddler
24th August 2019 10:59pm by Ahavati
24th August 2019 10:04pm by Ahavati
24th August 2019 5:08pm by Magdalena