deepundergroundpoetry.com

finding whats lost

iseek but cannot find ,
what each day takes away.
feels like its been left behind
i am not talking of trivial belongings
i am talking of the self
theres secrets ill never remember to tell
theres the trappings of my physical
why wasnt our skins made with zippers so we could truly ecscape
ourselves
stuck in a mind tortured by only illusions
remembrances of a suppressed youth
never taking anything too serious
striving the entire time to become who someone else expected
me to become
now im selfish for wanting to know me
when i look in this face i see nothing of the beauty i once was
i was a mother at fourteen a wife at eighteen
still no experience has compared
living at the time for everyone but me
so as i alone sift through these fragments of who i used to be
for some reason ive lost me
so look angry all the time
but inside  freedom is sublime
im never quite here it seems
and i slumber soley because on occasion i see me in my dreams
every time i find someone or thing to care about
it starts me new i shed the trappings of this exsistence
and move to the next
now not careing not even for myself
i cannot seem to find what with no emotions i have lost
Written by diablia363 (Alisha Ranstrom)
Published
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