The actual letter “send? Don’t send?”

I know things are what they are but that does not change the way I feel I remember the last time I called you on the phone and I had to tell you that I had to let you go because hearing your voice was killing me,
I could not keep doing it but I do regret saying that to you I truly believe that I could of maybe won you back
I wish I could change things, them the breaks I guess but that does not stop me from wanting you
you drove me wild then and you still do when I think of you which is more than you might realise
I tried to fill my life with everything other than you and the problem was it always came straight back to you
I can tell you honestly it did not matter if it was at the bottom of an empty bottle or laying awake I could not stop thinking if I did this or did that I might still be there with you
I always wondered if I stoped you from going up to see him that night I mean really put my foot down would I still be there I kept saying to myself you probably would of found a way
I believe somethings have to happen in order for people to re find themselves and in that I had to re find myself again and even when I did I was sad something was missing
I know the way you had to think so the pain could stop and you did that well you switched off and I’m glad one of us could because the pain is horrible
I wanted to tell you that there is one thing that I don’t believe that is that we rushed us because I look at it like this you was in love with me as I was with you we where happy til you receive a message from him on Facebook then it changed and you needed to believe that to make the decision that you did
I have gone through quite a few different paths since we have not spoken some you would know there is plenty that you don’t and all those story’s would not be told to you to make you feel guilt or shame it I did live them and lived them hard I just wish you could read my mind
I wanted to say it again it was a pleasure to talk with you again for those short few days