Mario Begins

So he was sitting there
Completely void of focus
He was searching for a purpose  
He was trying to find a balance
He was watching the walls
Fall around him
And he'd let them  
All the emptiness within him
Was consuming him
Ever since she left him  

And he's still not sure  
What went wrong
One moment she was there
And the next  
She had left  
After he saved her  
From the grips
Of an Ape called Donkey  
Now he's chilling  
Heartbroken  

In Brooklyn  
With his brother Luigi  

But luckily  
Work's been pretty
Crazy lately  
The sewers are over run  
With Turtles the size  
Of The Arm
He's not sure  
Where they've come from
But he's just seen  
A weird pipe  
That's bright  
Green
And a note
Afloat  
Aside of it
And it did read

"Hello
Mario  
My name is Toad
And you don't know me
But those turtles  
You've been chasing  
Are part  
Of the Kooper Army  
You see our princess is in peril  
Captured by a creature
Named Bowser  
Now the Mushroom Kingdom's  
In danger  
Because he's planning  
On marrying her  

And taking the throne
For his own  
And turning our homes  
Into dust
And our bones
In to mush  
So if you'd kindly rush  
And come and save us
That would be wicked  

Hopefully see you real soon"

So he went home
And thought  
What the fuck
Am I supposed to do?
I'm just a plumber  
And a doctor  
And a sub par  
Go kart racer  
Ain't ever been all that into danger  
Never had a heroic nature  
But from the sounds of the words  
That were wrote  
In that note  
This princess and her Kingdom
Sorely needs a saviour  

So he jumped to it
With only a hint hesitation
When he arrived  
On the other side  
Of the pipe
He woke up  
In a brand new dimension
Oh, I should mention
Within the first 30 seconds  
He fell into a hole  

And then he died

And then he woke up  
Head filled with thunder  
And he started to wonder  
Why he was back at the start  
All the Kooper Troopers  
And the Goombas
Were reset
To their starting positions  
And now he must
Continue his mission  
To save the princess  
And her weird as fuck Kingdom  

So he jumped to it  
Like this shit ain't no hassle  
And even though  
He died
Many times  
He finally arrived  
At the final level
He shot Bowser  
With a flower
Then was greeted  
By a woeful looking Toad stall  

Who said

"Hello Mario
My name is Toad  
And you're my hero
But it turns out  
That the Princess  
Is in another castle  
Apparently we had  
Some bad intel  
Man you never can tell  
Who you really can trust
There are Bowers spies  
Amongst  
All of us  
We use Mac's vetting system
But sometimes it ain't enough  

So  
Now it's time  
For the Crimson Plumber to rise
We're pretty sure we know
Which castle the princess is in this time
And if not?
Well, fuck it
We've got  
A few more  
You can try
And if not?  
Well, fuck it
We'll just keep pumping you  
Full of mushrooms so you don't die  
Trust me you'll be fine  

Flash cut now
To 30 odd years later  
The Princess is still lost  
And Mario's still trying to save her
Just like Coop  
He appears to be
Stuck in an infinite loop
Destined to play  
This cat and mouse game
Knowing that
Every single time  
He tries  
To save her life
It doesn't take long
Before she disappears right  
Before his eyes

Yet still he tries
 
Maybe none of this ever happened?
Maybe this is all a part of his subconscious  
Trying to make up for the fact that  
Pauline was never kidnapped?

Maybe she decided that it was best  
That she just left him
In his depression
After coming to the realisation  
That sometimes you can drown
Trying to help someone else swim  

So unable to deal with his solo reality  
He creates adventure after adventure
Putting a blonde-haired damsel
At the centre  
Hoping that one of these days  
He'll save her and she'll stay
Hoping that one of these days  
He'll save her and she'll say

Thank you  
I've missed you
I love you  

But those words will never be heard
And his princess will never returnTo this plumbers castle