My Diddles

Quit your tapping, they used to tell me,
Folks at work thought I was nervous,
And though they wouldn’t understand,
I was really refining my paradiddles.

It was about the wrist and having control,
Never letting your fingers off the stick,
Otherwise the line would sound dirty,
Or make the battery sound very pretty.

I sometimes caught myself fantasizing,
About flawless double strokes and flamadiddles,
With some inverted flam taps and ratamacues,
Mixed with cheese parafladdle-diddle-diddles.

Eggbeaters and deviled eggs, diddle egg fives,
Cheesy pancakes and swiss double paradiddles,
Tu-cheese, cheesy rolls, cupcakes, chutuddas,
Chumbly, churruckitahs and Chewbacca-diddles.

Nice and easy overeasy octadiddle trons,
Five stroke flamtas fufive fifty fives,
Funky cheese inverted ghost flams,
Flive-flafla-taps, flammed Chinese fives.

Cheese drag, flama chuck, flama chucka diddles,
Cheese flamalet and flammed zigiddy bops,
Cheeseacues, chutichuhs, chutra-cheese,
Cheese chatachichi, fubars and quickity klotz.

Double ratamaflam, flam drag, drag Pattys,
Double flamacue, flam drag diddle-diddles,
Double flammed swiss army triplets,
Dragateenth double parafladdle-diddles.

Flam Drag Flafla, flamafladdles flamadiddles,
Flama-Diddly, flama chucka diddle pattyacues,
Flam Five Pattys-Muppets-Jiggers-Hertas,
Flam beats-beaters and flam drag-a-poos.

Inverted threes, cheese paradiddle-diddles,
Inverted inverts, inverted cheese flam taps,
Inverted flam fours tap flam seven slevens,
Reverse dragadiddle, four stroke ruffadiddle taps.

Triplet pataflafla triple stroke tap drags,
Three stroke ruffadiddle triple-acues,
Triple flam-flam paradiddle, ratamaflan,
Triple dragaddidle, displaced flamacues.

Nuttchada, pataflaka, pattyadiddles,
Crazy Harry, Inverted Patty, Vladiment,
Walt-diddles tu-chachas and tu-chadas,
Threesomes three stroke ruffs and I’m spent.