I made it home

It was a long thirteen hour drive from the shitty city of the Antelope valley to Portland Oregon , somewhere around nine hundred miles and in those nine hundred miles I reflected and I allowed myself to feel for the first time in months . I sat in silence for the majority of it but as we got further away from the desert the weight of my shoulders began to lift with every mile and every city I began to see myself in a different light and I got a new perspective of who I was , The person that I have hidden for so long and once I was finally out of California I broke down and cried . I cried long and I cried hard at last my tortured past was behind me the abuse and toxic home I was in was gone . Then the trees began to reveal themselves covered in a soft pillow of snow the lakes glistened like something out of a fairytale , And for the first time I felt safe , as I began to shed old skin the real parts of me started to reveal themselves the warmness in my once cold heart began t reveal itself as if its never left . If im being truthful im not a hateful person i love everything from the dirt under my feet to the naked branches of the trees, I love easily so quick buti allowed myself to fall inlove again not only with myself but with someone that may eventually be a life partner believe me when i tell you he's sweetand makes me smile and for the first time i can confidently say that i fell in love with a personality before i saw a face but let me tell you those eyes were hypnotizing now Iv seen hazel eyes before but holy shit theres just this something about him that makes my heart skip a beat . honestly i can say that i have never felt this way for someone . He is only seven hundred and seventy eight miles a way a simple thirteen point two miles but the distance doesnt bother me cause he's worth it and him being by myside during such a complicated time in my life tells me hes committed , ill be seeing him alot sooner than i think so ill be patient and untill then ill be busy falling in love with my new home and myself all over again.