deepundergroundpoetry.com

Clinical breakdown of a personal tragedy                   





You did not take my call yesterday  
or the day before and even the previous day  
It's not unusual not in the least  
don't misinterpret my silence as my  
complete lack of surprise  
This silence is  of the rare kind  
one you would find over a tranquil lake  
during slow moving twilight in autumn  
  
I bleed with a pained smile and wait  
The whole world reciprocates in ignorant bliss  
Silently they move about trapped in their own
life capsules-demons-doves-developments [so they say]  
Oblivious I lie obliterated-cancerous void spreading  
faster then I could summarize my tragedy  
 
This is deja vu-you are a repetition-just another number  
in my long list  of ambiguities I can not live without  
and I assume my role of an escape-a parenthesis for you  
in the larger picture-a changeover between various recurring
acts of your life-clear cut and well-defined role
[it's one of its kind]  
 
Utterly deafening silence pulls the life out of folds of skin  
as tears sink back in [reverse osmosis is underway]  
survival mode  
  
My life is a stage and I am the thespian
You are a star and I am the star struck-who stabs his heart  
[when you beam]  
Uncontrollable spikes  of bliss shoot  
it's all optical illusion of the stage  
Misdirection techniques used to camoflage  
 
You are a lie-permanent beyond the event  
I am the truth and transient-awaiting my fall  
 
A mighty army lies by your side-dispensable-faceless
and nameless they are soldiers of misfotune  
I am powerless and spellbound by thousand black suns-  
which blind me in their collective glory-a flash  
[Fade to black]  
 
The drapery slides across-gushing while I stand ahead
alone on stage in the dark-shackled and broken winged  
the cherub with wounds and it remains that way as the
show continues  
  
I am the backstage now-the dark side of the doom-just an
artifact which could be used from time to time  
When bows would pierce the soft pulp and eyes would flutter  
In reaction, transcending above the mortal exit wounds  
And like this under your name the show would go on  
as the electromagnetic signals would race thru the phone  
         
I am just a character-I am just a name  
You have the licence and I have the silence    
Rare perfection achieved in short notice  
 
Congratulations as you have won the subscription of
a lifetime of modest heartbeats and frozen tears  
Use them, diffuse them-statues just stare in prayer  
and if you wish you can't locate my impression
Rot spreads fast in soft tissue that'd be the undoing  
But my billion trapped heart beats would accompany you  
as you trundle and glide in the giant masquerade  
 
Don't react when the mask crumbles it's but a nightmare
You had set my heart on fire & they warned you to not play  
Pyromania blended with indifference & quasi-amorous devotion  
for an anthropomorphic form of  sustainable yang since long ago  
whose bluish necrosis became a lifelong wet dream  

The penumbra of yab & yum in me showed you an oasis  
and look at the empire of rust you have built-  
ravaged & flourishing-permanent fixtures in this setting  
The architect of preamature disaster posing as diademed Diana  

I oscillate for the prognosis between you and impermeable fate.

Written by Whitewand6
Published | Edited 16th Jun 2012
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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