Silent Treatment

You said you loved me
 
As you chop ribbons off my fragile flesh with your shiny silver claws
 
Shards of glass held up profound into my brain
 
Everlastingly terrifying me
 
Gradually draining me dry
 
“That never really happened sweetheart, you are just making it up!”
 
“Oh, you were a child back then…. don’t sew scattered memories together”
 
“Shhhh…he is your uncle, we can’t out him like that”
 
Noises, voices, opinions, suggestions…all in vain
 
I learned to gulp in my silence
 
Hear me out!
 
The silent treatment truly screws you up
 
O how I wished that I could have killed you
 
Deepen my claws on your neck snatching away your juggler
 
What a sight that must have been right?
 
Do you remember what you use to tell me?
 
Darling don't be afraid, it’s just a little game
 
Where uncle plays the fisherman and you are his bait
 
Running fingers through my innocence
 
You dragged me by my arms
 
The world was yours to take
 
As you conquered me selfishly, inch by inch
 
Yes! I will say it out loud again
 
The silent treatment truly screws you up
 
Now I freeze at each adjustment in tone
 
I am scared of being alone
 
I lie to myself over and over again
 
I write myself death notes only to not work upon them
 
I cry!
 
I cry because I couldn't fight  
 
I couldn't let it go
 
I couldn't run away
 
I will say it out loud again! The silent treatment…
 
Oh, you are here…. you have been here all along, isn’t it?
 
So dearest uncle, how shall we be treating you?
 
Cut your arms, blade your nose is what I initially planned to do
 
But that would end the fun soon, right?
 
How about we play a little game like we use to?
 
Where I become the exterminator and you become my muse
 
Rush around the room with blinded eyes as I chase you
 
Bleeding furiously like I did
 
Telling me to let go like I did
 
Crying to stop like I did
 
But nothing I would do is a rectification of what's done to me
 
You bastard would still fetish abuse
 
Tell you what!
 
I would let you witness the madness you created
 
Caressing you with the same hand that you once choked
 
Holding your wretched brain, hostage
 
And then you…yes, the hellish you! would be better off alone!