HELP ME REMEMBER

I can't get it out of my head-
You smiling in a hospital bed.
Surrounded by family and friends.
If anyone,it should be me-
The one dying,suffering,
but the stronger you,was strong for me..
I've been drinking ever since.
A typical disappointment.
I can't seem to get it right.
Help me remember Jessie...
When you became unresponsive.
Couldn't tell us where the pain was.
You still inspired all of us.
sitting by your side-
While and when God took your life.
I was the one that closed your eyes..
And I've been sinking ever since-
You were my spiritual guidance-
I cant seem to get it right...
Without you here
Jessie