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Image for the poem Sold two sex robots One with a dick the other with a pussy

Sold two sex robots One with a dick the other with a pussy

Sold two sex robots One with a dick the other with a pussy


I thought they’d finally perfect heterosexual, penetrative sex and show us all what went wrong. I thought it would be beautiful, synchronized, like watching an old couple dancing with one another. I thought they would know each other’s bodies in a holy, miraculous way.
I envisioned a kind of electric connection, the pulsing of two minds and bodies joined as one. Finally, I thought, I would witness stars instead of the sloppy, slurping, clapping, suction-farting, sweaty mess I knew sex to be.
No. Instead, they formed a new, third thing.
They had sex like turtles climbing on top of one another, like crabs reaching for the edge of the pot, like two remote controlled trucks crashing into one another.
Have you ever seen Robot Wars?
It was some what like that. Their passionless eyes their eagerness to complete the task at hand.
It was like watching Furbys fuck.
They didn’t know what to do with their hands or arms, so they moved in this slow, overly-rhythmic matter. At first I thought my couch was just too small, so I turned them off and dragged them to the bed.
But no, they had sex the same way. They used only one small portion of the bed. Neither one of them took control, so it was just a constant squirming, a constant inching toward…something.
Sex between people was one thing, between one robot and one person was another, and between two robots was something so far removed from what I thought sex was that it was comical.
I sold the one with the penis as new. I explained to a few people that it had been used on another sex robot, and it didn’t seem to impact the sale. A married couple bought it.
The one with the vagina was another story. I had to sell it as used, even though it had only “had sex” with a robot penis. Still, somehow, the men were afraid that she would remember the hard, beautiful robot penis and they wouldn’t be able to compare.
The first man who came to check it out was disappointed.
“Hair looked blonder in the pictures.” The doll had a kind of dark blonde short cut. “And I would really prefer it longer. How long have you had her?”
Just a few of weeks it was kind of an experiment. I had the two of them have sex with one another.
Oh yeah! How was that?
“It was like…you ever go into the mall and they have those robot dogs that walk and do a back flip, but once they reach a corner they just walk into the same corner over and over again? It was like that.”
“Do you have video of it?”
“Actually, I didn’t think of that.”
“You should make videos.”
“Well, I already sold the other one.”
“The other robot, the one she had sex with…was there…you know. Was it big?”
A little bigger than average size?
“Oh.”
He left. Another man came. I instantly didn’t like the second one. He was so eager that I thought he would mount the thing right in front of me.
“What’s her mileage?”
“Excuse me?”
“How many miles of dick has she taken?”
“She’s just had sex once. With another sex robot so nothing alive…nothing with actual skin has been in there.”
“Oh yeah right, like you haven’t been fingering her I can tell.”
“I have not fingered her, no.”
“But still, how big was the other robot’s dick? And how many thrusts?”
“I don’t know…”
“Because that’s how you can calculate the mileage. Multiply dick length by number of thrusts.”
“That makes no sense. That’s like calculating the mileage of a rocking chair. It rocks back and forth but doesn’t go anywhere.”
“It shows how worn out it is.”
“That’s not…have you ever touched a vagina?” I didn’t mean for the question to come out harshly. I was more bewildered than anything.
“Of course I have. Lots of times, I just don’t like this doll. She has more mileage than you’re letting on.”
“Okay. If it’s not for you, that’s fine.”
“If you decide to come clean and tell me her mileage, or if you have any video of you fingering her, let me know.”
“I’ll keep that in mind.”
The third man seemed to want it, but I didn’t want to sell it to him.
“So, used, huh. What, ex-boyfriend?”
“She’s not really used. I bought two robots and had them do it. I just wanted to see.”
“That sounds hot. How was it? Was he really aggressive?”
“No. Neither of them were really aggressive. It was like…did you ever play The Sims? The old one I don’t know about the new ones, but sometimes they’d get confused and try to walk into a couch or a chair. It was kind of like that.”
“Oh. How difficult do you think it would be to cut off her fingers?”
“What?”
“Do you think it would be harder or easier than a real woman? Or about the same
I pretended to check my phone.
“Oh, you know what, a person who saw the doll earlier says he wants it.”
“Really”
“Yeah he has already sent me the money.”
“Oh well. If anything changes, you have my number.”
“I sure do.”
After that, I called the couple who had bought the doll with the penis.
“I would like to give you the companion as well.”
“Oh. We really can’t afford another one.”
My treat
“You can’t find a buyer for the other one?”
The process just seems…more intricate than it’s worth. And hey, someone said they want to see videos of the two doing it. That could be a money-making venture.
“Sure. Thank you! If we decide to do videos, we will give you a cut of it.”
“Thanks. You can come by today. She’s ready. And has all her fingers.”
“What?”
“She’s in great shape.”
I got off the phone and looked at her.
She would be better off with her companion, having their awkward walking-into-a-wall style sex. It was weird, but they had the same rhythm.
It fit. It was beautiful, not in the way I had anticipated, but in its own way.
By nutbuster
Written by nutbuster (D C)
Published
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