If you only knew...

If only you knew, The tears that fall. If only you knew, she wants to end It all. If only you felt, the pain she feels. If only you knew. If only. She smiles, she laughs but when she goes home, she presses cool metal against her dome. Oh this devil just won’t leave her alone. He wants her bad, he craves her soul. If only you could see, it’s all a façade. You claim you all know her but you don’t know her at all. If only you knew that she feels so flawed. If only you heard her cry out for god. But he never hears her so she no longer believes. Sad to realize how religion deceives. This feeling of dread, It just won’t leave. She’s begging, she’s pleading, she’s down on her knees!  If only you knew, her heart is broken. She’s got love from her man but it's only spoken. If only you knew, life split them apart. If only you knew, she’s right back at the start. No matter how hard she works it’s always taken away. No such thing as happiness fore its been led astray. She’s welcoming death fore its calling her name. She’s using it's shovel to dig her own grave. If only you knew, how scared she really is. Continuously failing at life’s pop quiz. They say It gets better, but does It really ever? This storm, oh lord! How she just can’t weather.  If only you knew, the hurt she’s been through. If only you knew, if only. It’s gotten so dark and so lonely. They claim god gives his strongest battles to his toughest soldiers, but the weight of this boulders too much for her shoulders. She wants to believe and keep faith alive but how can she when she’s dying inside? Move on, get over It, just let It go! Dramatic, you’re acting, up you should grow! You’re seeking attention! It's all for show! Unless they experience her struggle they’d never truly know. No one really care until you end up dead. I guess a coffin would prove certain things were better left unsaid. If only you knew how hard she tries. If only you knew how your words chastise. If you truly don’t care, then move out of her way! She doesn’t need liars all up in her face! If only you knew the countless times, this girl has wiped her own tears from her eyes. Her only confidant was her mirrors reflection. Pointing herself in some sort of direction. No one to talk to, fore whoa is me. The victim they made her out to be. Always saying "I’m here when you need me," but they meant that to a degree. "You can call me to vent," up to a point you see. She’s everyone’s therapist, how her phone blows up with calls, but turned the other way around and no ones really there at all.  If only you knew how tired she is, practicing ascesis day out and day in. I commend her, fore staying that strong is hard to do. Boy oh boy, if only you knew.