Happy.

I grew up well-treated by most close family. Those I lived with. Those I was misled to trust. Father was a drunk. Father cheated on Mother with Amanda, some stranger. Father wanted to name me after her if I came out in favor. Mother wanted something special. Mother wanted happy. Mother did not want me Kinned Amanda, she wanted happy. I became Tryston.  
Father wanted visitations twice a year. But Father wanted Brother instead. Father did not care for Tryston because Brother didn't need taken care of. Brother did not need the Adderall or the Clonidine. Brother was a model child.  
Tryston stayed moody in his room most nights afraid to associate with Mother, though loved her dearly. She was his salvation. But he never listened to Dear Mother as she spoke her Antivenom. He felt it Poison instead.
 
Tryston had friends. Few and far between. Angel was his favorite. Angel played nice and spoke kind. Angel loved hard. Almost as hard as Tryston. Angel spoke easy words and read books with Tryston. He fell for her. The Youngest of two as well, Angel related to Him. Tryston was seven when he met Her. Tryston was seven when she Killed herself.  
See, Angel had a bully. He was a fifth grader. She called him Wolf, which Tryston found funny in His days as Wolf called her Pig. But Pig was TRYSTON'S Angel. Wolf wanted to prey on Angel. Wolf did things to Angel. Wolf waited for Tryston's blind eye. Wolf took Angel underneath bleachers, to Teacher's blind eye. Tryston went to Angel's big Oak tree. Tryston waited. And waited. And waited. Angel was not around. Tryston found Angel under bleachers with big, bad Wolf's penis inside her. Tryston was frozen. Paralysis shot through the Boy as he watched HIS Angel, raped and broke, touched by the Wolf. Tryston stayed under the big Oak until Wolf was finished.  
This was a Nightmare for Tryston. But Tryston went to pick up HIS Angel from off the ground to carry her home. HIS Angel's blue eyes stared into his, searching for a hint of mercy. There was none. Tryston's fury burned within.  
Tryston burned his arms at their core carrying HIS Angel. The Wolf was not finished. The wolf ran rampant and Wolf knocked Angel out of Tryston's arms. Angel rolled into the street. Tryston saw the car, but knew he would not be quick enough, without sacrificing one life for another. So Tryston stayed put and watched her both legs crush. SNAP! Wolf took off at the sound, laughing with his fiery breath. Tryston picked Angel up once more, thankful for her living breath. Tryston curses God, but secretly remains gratefully indebted: for She is unconscious in his arms. For She feels no pain, Tryston thought. Tryston pulled the knife from off the ground that Wolf had dropped when he pushed Angel out of his pocket after placing her carefully on the bed. He opened the knife, contemplating it through his stomach. Would that be easier than his throat? Tryston did not see Angel wake up or hear a sound. Angel called out to him “No” before passing out. Tryston closed the knife. Tryston was, yet again, grateful. Tryston placed the knife with a note scrawled “p r o t e c t i o n” on her dresser before going home and to sleep.  
Tryston went to school the next day. Angel did not. He wondered where she is. Has she left me alone with the Wolf? I go to Angel's house, to her bedroom. Her parents were away without her on a business trip. Angel grew up fast out of necessity, as Tryston did. Tryston grew up fast that day when he learned the cruelty of the world. Tryston was the last person to see HIS dearest Angel alive. Tryston found his knife pierced her throat. There were other wounds. Tryston found three of five total wounds to her neck. Tryston pulled the knife from her bleeding throat, washed her blood off, called the ambulance and explained the story. And Tryston's intentions were made clear and were to be covered up when things were finished. Tryston pocketed the blade only after speaking to Angel's EMT.  
Tryston went to the school with a knife and slayed the big, bad Wolf. His nightmare was over, he thought.  
 
Tryston grew up quick in a household strict, but not bad. Tryston smiled everyday. Tryston loved making others happy. Tryston wanted what he thought was best for his family. Brother and Mother, that is. Father was liable to burn in Hell.  
Tryston met a boy once at the less-than-ripened age of 14; his name was Kaleb. Kaleb was his. Kaleb was a thief Tryston met in a convenience store. Tryston had grown tired of writing one day and decided to hunt for inspiration. He lost track of things to write about and the world was so overwhelming. Tryston wanted to write though. Tryston was determined! Tryston went out after school some days and after long hours and coming up short, he would spend any money he had and sometimes Mother's money to buy from the store clerk. Tryston craved Mountain Dew that day and as he reached for the soda, Kaleb did too. Tryston stood in front of this beautiful, perfect stranger. Their hands met, but Kaleb pulled his and spoke in harmonics “It's yours.” Tryston took the soda and walked out but Tryston was not thinking of paying. It slipped his mind. Kaleb walked out soon after but stopped and sat with the Boy. Kaleb and Tryston spoke many beautiful, awful, wonderful stories. Tryston and Kaleb fell in love on a big hill across from their store. That was the store they heisted time and time again before. Tryston and Kaleb each practiced each others crafts and perfected them. Who now was the thief and who the writer? Those lines became blurred. Days became weeks and they ran their heists and wrote their poems. Tryston forgot to write about Kaleb that day, though because Tryston lived in the moment. Once again, Tryston was selfish. Once again, it led to failure.  
See, Kaleb was Tryston's Soul Mate. Kaleb also was a thief: of hearts and retail. Tryston and Kaleb both stole as much as they could carry in sweets and drinks. The air felt different on the night Kaleb died. Tryston shivered in the autumn gust but remained at the door, on lookout. Tryston almost didn't see the hooded man with the mask. But Tryston did see and Tryston saw the gun as it was pulled and aimed at the register. Kaleb told me to go. I waited on our hill by the store. Tryston stood under it's big Oak which reminded him of HIS Angel. Tryston thought awful thoughts. Tryston waited. Tryston should have stayed. Tryston and Kaleb were never to see each other face-to-face again. Not after the police came.  
The gunman emerged in handcuffs guided by the cop to the squad car and eventually inside it. The other cop talked into the radio as I listened to his muffled, garbled alien speak. What did he say? The first cop spoke to the other and the store's doors produced Kaleb from thin air! He was alive! Tryston saw him there and waved his arms. Kaleb began to walk to Tryston! The cop stood in his way. The cop yelled “freeze!” Tryston gasped, but stayed in shadow. Kaleb ran for our hill. Kaleb ran for me. Cops saw Kaleb as a threat. Cop put two bullets in his head and chest. Kaleb fell. Tryston stood, overcome again by paralysis. Tryston heard sirens in the distance and went to His house. Tryston never did get to write that poem for Kaleb to read.  
 
Tryston moved to Texas at just 10 years old! But before that, in the second grade, he met a girl named Lacey. Lacey was a friend. Lacey knew many things and liked to share them with Tryston so that Tryston may know many things too, but Lacey never shared her pain. Lacey lived a life she told to be happy. Lacey told lies. Lacey hurt more than Tryston ever has. Lacey one day woke up without a family. There was a fire. Her house burned her family to ash and Lacey survived because Lacey slept in a dog house out back. Lacey came from an abusive family. Lacey was their pet dog. But Lacey was a friend.  
Tryston made more friends in Texas, none really lasting. Tryston and Mother moved back to Virginia while Brother stayed behind. Brother kept his life.  
Mother waited a few years. Tryston is 14 and back in the town in which he was born, but not the one he knew. Tryston found Lacey. Tryston cried reading her headstone. “Here, lies.” That's all it said, and all she ever told. Lacey lied to make others happy. Lacey used to sing for Tryston. Lacey used to like when Tryston pushed her on the swing. Lacey used to be alive. Lacey and Tryston used to be together. Lacey is dead now. Tryston found her grave. Why did Tryston have to know? Why did Lacey's Mother find Tryston and tell him his friend is dead? Why did Lacey's Mother curl her lips upwards, that of a smile, when she spoke? Tryston placed flowers on her grave, unable to shed even a single tear. “We've come too far, guys,” Tryston thought to himself. “We can't give up.” Tryston spoke to his friends, even though they could no longer hear him. Tryston was alone.  
Virginia became Hell for Tryston. He has lost so many here and now another. Why did Mother want to come back? Why, Mother?  
 
Tryston now lives in fear. Impoverished to bravery. Tryston knows how to be “Happy.” Tryston is “Happy” to be in college. Tryston is “Happy” for Brother, now that they live together once more, but he doesn't know why Brother bothered to come back. Tryston is “Happy” to start his life over. Tryston just wants his friends back. Alas is seems there is no hope for the Boy. Tryston has grown “Stronger” because of his experiences. Tryston is weak. Tryston is selfish. Tryston has grown in the wrong direction. Tryston strays from the good in his heart knowing that maybe the thing that really needed to change was himself.  
A count of twelve human beings Tryston set off to live in his heart now shatter it to pieces every single day. On this day, Tryston decides to write of the three that meant most. Tryston chose to remember them, while laying awake in bed, crying silent tears so Mother and Brother stay at peace in their slumber. Tryston doesn't want them to hear him cry. Tryston has grown “Stronger.”  
Tryston keeps the knife next to a note that says “P r o t e c t i o n.”
Tryston wrote some poems about a boy he once knew  
Tryston likes to go on the swings and sing songs and visits the graveyard.  
Tryston is “Happy.”