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What Hurts the Most

White scary walls everywhere I go
sitting by his bedside we're waiting to know

How badly his body is hurting him believe me I do mind
the key to his recovery we've been wanting to find
Blaming ourselves for not seeing this sooner
to soothe our minds I wish for a piano crooner
Scared for his life a memory is conjured this instant
to the here and now that memory seems so distant

But here it comes to me in the blink of an eye
I'm there saying this has to be goodbye
We can't go on like this any longer
ending this will make us both stronger
This friendship has to be just a friendship and stay that way
please let me say the things I need to say...we'll both be okay
Loving him for a lifetime still wouldn't be enough
but as we were standing there he calls my bluff

His warm lips on mine, I started to cry
kissing him back made my emotions fly
Breaking the kiss and breaking my heart, in an instant this memory flew by
and now sitting here with him, never in a million years I wanna say goodbye
He's my rock ,my love and he's always been there
spilling all these secrets now my heart so bare
So vulnerable, so bitter and sweet
between us you can feel this heat
To feel like this so beautifully terrible, there is no way
to give this love voice, this area is not grey

No this is not grey; it's black and white
and now this I swear and this I write
No matter how much his wife loves him remember this I swore
he's mine and I'm his, thus, I will always love him more
And I hear the wife approaching her heels sounding against the floor
sometimes I wish I had never opened this door
For now I know the error of my ways
and now it's myself I amaze

I am the other woman in this twisted triangle of love
this is not a deed that I would approve of
The need to flee
is here with me
And I cannot ignore this need I desire
not that this a need I deserve or require
No matter, this need I feel
its starting, now, a turning wheel
My head starts spinning and I see her coming near
with pain in my heart, I'm starting to fear

For my life, my love, if she ever finds out
now I know, I shouldn't have taken this route
Never would I regret the love I have for this man
what I regret is not sticking to my plan
In the future I want to know this heartache wasn't meaningless
that it will all add up to something wonderful not senseless
The thought of letting you go is torment
but i hope our love was time well spent
I have to leave
and start to grieve
For this has to be the end
making it my time to mend

The life of my love is dead, never to resurrect, it is a ghost
this goodbye, this end, will always be What Hurts The Most...



             Soul of my Soul
                            becomes
                               Sealed in Time
                                   and ends with
                                        What Hurts the Most...
ThiaTartorum
Written by ThiaTartorum
Published
Author's Note
This poem is mostly fiction but the feelings behind it are my way of letting go of someone from my past, someone that at one point I cared about..This is the last installment of the Proditione...
This poem is mostly fiction but the feelings behind it are my way of letting go of someone from my past, someone that at one point I cared about..This is the last installment of the Proditione trilogy.
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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