deepundergroundpoetry.com
Anxiety and Depression
Laid in bed alone,
Staring at the ceiling,
Its dark like the fear,
The fear of ANXIETY,
The LONLINESS of EXSISTANCE,
Deep dark corners of DEPRESSION.
The DISSAPOINTMENT,
The TEARS,
The HOPE,
The HOPE THAT NEVER COMES.
Wanting to be loved,
Yet SCARED to LOVE,
The ENDLESS THOUGHTS,
THE ENDLESS FEAR OF REJECTION.
To be ACCEPTED for who I am,
Yet HIDE AWAY from the world,
The LIFE of ANXIETY and DEPRESSION,
THOUGHTS running through my head,
THE ENDLESS RUNNING,
HIDING,
CRYING,
FEAR,
FEAR OF THE DARK DARK CORNERS OF
ANXIETY AND DEPRESSION
Published 28th Nov 2018
Author's Note
my name is Tiffany.
i normally write in my book every night so thoughts are on paper and not my head. This is new to me, my very first peice. let me know what you think!
i normally write in my book every night so thoughts are on paper and not my head. This is new to me, my very first peice. let me know what you think!
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 4
reading list entries 1
comments 4
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
28th Nov 2018 9:17pm
Good to read your poem ... if you want critique go into groups and ask at the poetry medics ...
Not bad at all for your very first piece...you could take the time to go back and correct a few spelling and word use errors...for example...
Stanza 1, Line 1...*Lay* in bed, not laid
L 5,*Existence*, not existance
S2, L1,*Disappointment*,
Tiffany...ALL CAPS is frowned upon... too much like shouting... there are other ways to emphasize and caps can be used more judiciously. Your off to a good start... you can edit yourself, especially things like spelling and word usage...Google is a great help...
If you want more help with this... or form, rhyme, placement, etc... I would suggest taking it to ''The Poetry Medics'' for assistance... we can be found in ''Groups,'' up there with 'My DU', and 'Competitions' and such.
You're off to a good start... keep on workin'... see you out there... Ely
Stanza 1, Line 1...*Lay* in bed, not laid
L 5,*Existence*, not existance
S2, L1,*Disappointment*,
Tiffany...ALL CAPS is frowned upon... too much like shouting... there are other ways to emphasize and caps can be used more judiciously. Your off to a good start... you can edit yourself, especially things like spelling and word usage...Google is a great help...
If you want more help with this... or form, rhyme, placement, etc... I would suggest taking it to ''The Poetry Medics'' for assistance... we can be found in ''Groups,'' up there with 'My DU', and 'Competitions' and such.
You're off to a good start... keep on workin'... see you out there... Ely
29th Nov 2018 6:48pm
Really good way to start. An excellent, heartfelt write. If I can just agree with Ely about CAPS and spellings. And do check out Poetry Medics for some good advice.
1st Dec 2018 4:50am
