My pain made me strong but almost killed me

My pain made me strong but almost killed me.
If my life was to be written in a book, it'll be a sad sad story.  
A man life written in misery.  
Despite it all I just want to remember my faintest memories of glory.  
All the years of loss,  
All my years of my rise and fall have made me strong.  
I had to act tough and hide my scars yet that almost killed me.  
Every moment of joy has a stain of blood.  
I can't afford to take a corner of happiness, I'm always thinking about the pain that awaits ahead.  
I'm a man who walked through hell and back.  
At least that's how I'd like you to remember my story.  
I've only learned to live my life looking back.  
I've had many friends the evidence is in the number of scars on my back.  
I once had a home, I once was loved but all that is buried in the sand.  
I doubt that I'll even have someone to put my coffin into the hearse.  
No tears to follow my coffin when buried in the sand.  
You might think I have it good.  
Now that I have nothing to lose.  
Oh how I wish that was true.  
I long for someone to cut me loose from  these holds of loneliness.  
To free me from the shackles of time,  
And bring back these dead walking bones to life.  
My pain made me strong but I guess it killed me.  
Everyday it's just another page in this diary of a dead man.