John Smith's Realization

Rarely  
- if ever -  
did he have a real plan.  
Long term goals involving  
specific strategy and tactics  
remained, always, outside his thought process,  
always, absent in formatting
his routine, practice, or actions.  
Many a turn he made  
never a turning point, he reached...  
 
John Smith  
spent his days  
just reacting to anything  
jolting his comfort level  
- from childhood to college  
from marriage to fatherhood, work and finances -  
simply a reactive mass of flesh,  
he had, always, been  
with a constant vague anguish in mind  
with a constant pain in his guts...  
 
This was  
the realization  
John Smith, suddenly, came to  
in an accidental moment of clarity  
- in all truth, it brought him a slight smile -  
It really didn't surprise him.  
What did, what really shocked him,  
was that he came that far  
even if that "far"  
was where he had, always, been...