deepundergroundpoetry.com
Fruit Loop
your rage was coca cola bottles
carbonated and explosive when shook
I popped a cork in the fallout shelter
the rusted sky shout at me in curses
in the purple hours when I cry
my pink panties laugh at the sun
with his silly polka dot smile
when I died in the yellow
you mourned me with your protest signs
the phone rang, it was for the fighter
retired to Mr. Clean
you witness an end to fruit loops
laughing a little in spite of yourself
you coughed too hard
and I almost pissed myself
Freud is investigating my daddy issues
using a telescope
cause man I'm way out there
inside the blue room
I find little pieces of my mind
picking them up off the angry carpet
I tape my mouth shut
in the rainbow rain
I discover I'm still alive
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likes 17
reading list entries 3
comments 28
reads 844
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
Re. Fruit Loops
Anonymous
9th Sep 2018 5:20pm
YOU are awesome, my friend!
How the heck do you write so much? And so well??!!!
It takes me a month to write something, it's terrible, and then I'm in a coma for 4 days until my brain returns!!
Very good, my friend.
Love,
Matthew.
How the heck do you write so much? And so well??!!!
It takes me a month to write something, it's terrible, and then I'm in a coma for 4 days until my brain returns!!
Very good, my friend.
Love,
Matthew.
2
Re: Re. Fruit Loops
9th Sep 2018 5:23pm
giggles thank you Matthew you're funny... this one was just kind of a fun one but there is a message even in my madness...
I'm happy you enjoyed it ✨
as for my writing as I said it took me time...
you write from your soul nothing more beautiful than that 💕
love Brenda
I'm happy you enjoyed it ✨
as for my writing as I said it took me time...
you write from your soul nothing more beautiful than that 💕
love Brenda
Re: Re. Fruit Loops
Anonymous
9th Sep 2018 5:31pm
Thanks Brenda! You're sooo darn good. I just love reading you!
AND, Froot Loops were my favorite cereal as a young man!(still are, actually).
Love ya,
Matthew.
AND, Froot Loops were my favorite cereal as a young man!(still are, actually).
Love ya,
Matthew.
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loops
9th Sep 2018 5:48pm
lol fruit loop, in this case, was a reference to my state of mind says giggling 😂
thank you dearest Matthew you're too kind to me 💕
love Brenda
thank you dearest Matthew you're too kind to me 💕
love Brenda
Re. Fruit Loop
Anonymous
9th Sep 2018 5:59pm
I know Kiddo, but I'm hungry! Lol!
Can you please write Turkey Sandwich next? 😊
Love you so,
Matthew.
Can you please write Turkey Sandwich next? 😊
Love you so,
Matthew.
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 6:04pm
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
Anonymous
9th Sep 2018 6:15pm
Thanks! And you're so darn talented! And thanks for not taking my kidding wrong!
XOXOXO!!
Matthew.
XOXOXO!!
Matthew.
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
Anonymous
9th Sep 2018 6:38pm
One of those is MY heart, that you've stolen away!
Matthew.
Matthew.
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 6:44pm
Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 6:46pm
Astonishing work, Crim. Very funny but it also has your usual visionary quality. My favorite lines:
inside the blue room
I find little pieces of my mind
picking them up off the angry carpet
I tape my mouth shut
Can't seem to locate the pieces of my own mind. Oh well...
inside the blue room
I find little pieces of my mind
picking them up off the angry carpet
I tape my mouth shut
Can't seem to locate the pieces of my own mind. Oh well...
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 7:33pm
thank you graciously dearest Sir Crow for feeling those lines 🌹
I deeply appreciate you...
love Crim
I deeply appreciate you...
love Crim
Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 6:57pm
Dear Crim...you are "way out there"...which is why I love your work...
Dark Sun.
Dark Sun.
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 7:34pm
thank you graciously dearest Dark Sun for the love giggles yeah I kind of am 😂
love Crim
love Crim
Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 10:21pm
Wasn't sure where this was going but it sure was a fun ride...a kaleidoscope of color
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
9th Sep 2018 10:58pm
Re. Fruit Loop
10th Sep 2018 00:58am
"Freud is investigating my daddy issues
using a telescope
cause man I'm way out there"
love it
Jeff
using a telescope
cause man I'm way out there"
love it
Jeff
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
10th Sep 2018 8:33pm
Anonymous
- Edited 30th May 2019 3:51pm
10th Sep 2018 4:00pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
10th Sep 2018 8:34pm
Re. Fruit Loop
11th Sep 2018 00:10am
This is awesome! One of your best!! The way you inferweave connercials and colors and sensations creates a kaleidoscope of meanings like a modern Wonderland. Easily one of my faves you’ve produced, Brenda! (And that’s saying something)
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
11th Sep 2018 4:02am
Re. Fruit Loop
11th Sep 2018 2:47pm
Wow, I love the way you weave the real & serious together with the fun & frivolous here. Excellent write!
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
12th Sep 2018 5:48pm
Re. Fruit Loop
14th Sep 2018 2:06am
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
14th Sep 2018 7:21pm
Re. Fruit Loop
17th Sep 2018 10:38am
“Freud is investigating my daddy issues
using a telescope
cause man I'm way out there “ this line was so brilliant my dear! Excellent as ever :)
using a telescope
cause man I'm way out there “ this line was so brilliant my dear! Excellent as ever :)
1
Re: Re. Fruit Loop
23rd Sep 2018 3:19pm