deepundergroundpoetry.com
JESUS IS MY FRIEND.
JESUS IS MY FRIEND.
Your friend can affect your mind and change your style.
He can make you cheer and laugh or tend to wail.
Tell me who your dear friend is, l can tell you
who exactly you can be, and it turns true.
I've read books about old myths and histories,
and those heroes who have lived in friaries,
but l cannot find a man whom l love more
than Jesus Whom l admire and adore.
He is Whom l love as man of refined traits.
He has such great might of heart that never hates.
No one can be strong like Him and bear a grudge.
He forgives all as He can't the weak men judge.
He's made me love all my life as l do now
as most gleeful sight He can my eyes endow.
I've begun to see all folk as most loved men,
which grants me a tranquil heart void of all strain.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
____________________________________
Your friend can affect your mind and change your style.
He can make you cheer and laugh or tend to wail.
Tell me who your dear friend is, l can tell you
who exactly you can be, and it turns true.
I've read books about old myths and histories,
and those heroes who have lived in friaries,
but l cannot find a man whom l love more
than Jesus Whom l admire and adore.
He is Whom l love as man of refined traits.
He has such great might of heart that never hates.
No one can be strong like Him and bear a grudge.
He forgives all as He can't the weak men judge.
He's made me love all my life as l do now
as most gleeful sight He can my eyes endow.
I've begun to see all folk as most loved men,
which grants me a tranquil heart void of all strain.
BY JOSEPH ZENIEH
____________________________________
Published 3rd Aug 2018
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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comments 7
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Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
4th Aug 2018 10:34pm
Explores the Jesus as Friend theme. As a song says of Him, "You're my friend and you are my brother even though you are a king".
4th Aug 2018 11:05pm
Very dear Solomon_song,
That's really wonderful. I love the words you have written. They are really great.
That's really wonderful. I love the words you have written. They are really great.
6th Aug 2018 4:08pm
This is an exercise in the fallacy of the appeal to personal incredulity. Just because YOU do not know of any man who deserves to be loved more than you love Jesus does not mean that there is no such man. And then there is the question not only of whether the Jesus you love is the Jesus the Gospels attest to (Jesus is not portrayed in the Gospels as being a man of "refined traits"), but whether he deserves to be loved.
Besides that, given your use of inversions and forced rhyme, your "poem" is hardly an example of good writing. It's also all tell and no show. Your apparent belief that for a writing to be poetry it should follow the form and structure of 18th and 19th century poetry really gets in the way, and is one of the main causes, of your turning out again and again turgid and often incomprehensible and grammatically unsound verse.
Besides that, given your use of inversions and forced rhyme, your "poem" is hardly an example of good writing. It's also all tell and no show. Your apparent belief that for a writing to be poetry it should follow the form and structure of 18th and 19th century poetry really gets in the way, and is one of the main causes, of your turning out again and again turgid and often incomprehensible and grammatically unsound verse.
6th Aug 2018 11:40pm
Dear Baldwin,
Thank you for your great interest in my writings. Believe me l mean it. Please tell me who you are. I am eager to start a friendship with you and friendship can't start without knowing each other, and show me a poem of yours. Please.
Thank you for your great interest in my writings. Believe me l mean it. Please tell me who you are. I am eager to start a friendship with you and friendship can't start without knowing each other, and show me a poem of yours. Please.
7th Aug 2018 1:26am
7th Aug 2018 12:17pm
7th Aug 2018 3:31pm
Sorry, no. You should be fully able to do this yourself. There are, after all, certain search functions readily available here in what appears within and above these messages.
