deepundergroundpoetry.com
ONE SIDED
Hi baby!
excuse me?
I always call you that
of course I know you have a name
know it as well as my own
come on now
you know that is NOT
my name
what’s wrong bab...I mean…?
who?
never heard of her
I don’t know why her name’s in my contacts
maybe it came with the phone
YES, I AM taking this seriously
lighten up jeez!
okay, okay LISTEN I’m sorry
I don’t KNOW her
how could we have gone out?
who said they saw us?
HIM?
hell he’s wanted you for years
WHAT, maybe now’s his chance?
why would you say that?
WAIT, WAIT you mean her?
Ah she’s just a coworker
we go to lunch sometimes
last Friday? maybe
I WAS NOT holding her hand
I was comforting her
A KISS, NO!
oh that meant nothing
she’s European
give me a break!
you’re my one and only
you know that
you are not the only one I lie to
I mean...hell you know what I mean
So, are we still on for Saturday?
I WILL NOT go to hell!
and WHY do you keep calling me that name?
You know I love you, right?
since when did you start using the ‘F’ word?
and, again, with my new name
I’ll call you later?
hello?
hello, babe?
HELLLOOOOOO!
WHATEVER!
excuse me?
I always call you that
of course I know you have a name
know it as well as my own
come on now
you know that is NOT
my name
what’s wrong bab...I mean…?
who?
never heard of her
I don’t know why her name’s in my contacts
maybe it came with the phone
YES, I AM taking this seriously
lighten up jeez!
okay, okay LISTEN I’m sorry
I don’t KNOW her
how could we have gone out?
who said they saw us?
HIM?
hell he’s wanted you for years
WHAT, maybe now’s his chance?
why would you say that?
WAIT, WAIT you mean her?
Ah she’s just a coworker
we go to lunch sometimes
last Friday? maybe
I WAS NOT holding her hand
I was comforting her
A KISS, NO!
oh that meant nothing
she’s European
give me a break!
you’re my one and only
you know that
you are not the only one I lie to
I mean...hell you know what I mean
So, are we still on for Saturday?
I WILL NOT go to hell!
and WHY do you keep calling me that name?
You know I love you, right?
since when did you start using the ‘F’ word?
and, again, with my new name
I’ll call you later?
hello?
hello, babe?
HELLLOOOOOO!
WHATEVER!
Published 11th Jun 2018
Author's Note
I wrote this back in January of 2014 felt it was worth unearthing. Enjoy!
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 6
reading list entries 0
comments 12
reads 654
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
11th Jun 2018 11:19pm
11th Jun 2018 11:41pm
12th Jun 2018 1:43am
I like this. Funny, just yesterday I was thinking about writing a series of dialogues. Now I am really inspired!
12th Jun 2018 1:54am
Awesome, I enjoy writing dialogs on monologues they answer the "what would you say if?" question. Thank you for your kind words of encouragement. I'll5be sure to read your dialogs.
This is just wonderful. You were able to keep the momentum perfectly.
It reminded me so much of a small book i read awhile back, called 'Fried Calamari' i don't know if its still in print but i'm sure you'll be able to find it on amazon. The whole book is just a dialogue between a man and a woman on first date, slowly drawing the characters from the initial first expression to the core truth. I highly recommend it.
But back to this, you did a fantastic job with it.
It reminded me so much of a small book i read awhile back, called 'Fried Calamari' i don't know if its still in print but i'm sure you'll be able to find it on amazon. The whole book is just a dialogue between a man and a woman on first date, slowly drawing the characters from the initial first expression to the core truth. I highly recommend it.
But back to this, you did a fantastic job with it.
12th Jun 2018 5:33am
Thank you do much Layla! I'm casting my net for "Fried Calamari" now 😀 Another scenario is "My Dinner With Andre " an awesome film with one of my favorite comedic character actors, Wallace Shawn. I appreciate enormously your comments. Cheers!
12th Jun 2018 12:01pm
Though perhaps not your main intention, this reminded me of many Bob Newhart phone conversations.
It also reminded me of how hearing only one side of a conversation can lead to so many misinterpretations of what is really being said.
The last line, I feel, is the only word, that speaks his true self.
Well done, and enjoyed.
It also reminded me of how hearing only one side of a conversation can lead to so many misinterpretations of what is really being said.
The last line, I feel, is the only word, that speaks his true self.
Well done, and enjoyed.
12th Jun 2018 7:41pm
I absolute love those old Bob Newhart bits. I just got a retro phonograph for Christmas and Newhart's "Button Down Mind" was the first record I bought. There's a funny program on Amazon Prime called "The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel " In one scene her aspiring comedian husband steals the entire Abe Lincoln bit, verbatim, from Newhart.
Mine was inspired by "a friend" who found texts between his significant other and an old flame. The text only revealed his, the old beau's, side of the conversation.
Thank you so much for your kind words...I'm glad you're back.
Mine was inspired by "a friend" who found texts between his significant other and an old flame. The text only revealed his, the old beau's, side of the conversation.
Thank you so much for your kind words...I'm glad you're back.
12th Jun 2018 8:03pm
I feel like I'm eavesdropping reading this. Brilliant use of conversational style (albeit one-sided) and hilarious verbal faux pas:
you are not the only one I lie to
I mean...hell you know what I mean
Great job Gahdess. Maybe you could use this as material for a collaboration and make it two sided. Just a thought.
you are not the only one I lie to
I mean...hell you know what I mean
Great job Gahdess. Maybe you could use this as material for a collaboration and make it two sided. Just a thought.
12th Jun 2018 9:18pm
Thank you Sir Crow! That's a great idea. I am glad you get my sense of humor. I appreciate very much your support.
22nd Jun 2018 5:03am
I found light comedy in this. Also could relate.nice work..hope you have more like this.
22nd Jun 2018 6:50am
Thank you Red! This was fun to write so I will probably do another. I appreciate your kind words of encouragement.
