Image for the poem Steampunk:  ONLY TIME WILL TELL


The people say that Emma Bliss
Is either a dame, or a man.
To tell apart, I don’t care, Miss
If I ever might, will or can.

The brilliant part about all this,
And please don’t contradict me here,
(With Times of Steampunk upon us):
Is that I’m a gay buccaneer!

You mean “happy”? Cor’, don’t be daft,
No time for keel-hauling high-jinx!
I’d rather stick ye on a raft
With rea’l sticks, what do ye think!

And it’s olde hat, don’t y’ know, mate;
A pirate tooling on the sea.
There’s better ways to switch & bait
If you plan to calibrate me.

I wear a single eye patch, natch,
Even though I could always see.
A gender-switch w’ same-sex snatch,
A parrot* on me bony knee.

(*Who notches brass locks w’ its beak )

No matter what I’m; Sir or Miss,
Together we’ll rape the high seas.
No favours you’ll get with a kiss;
Mechanical toys run on steam.

But not just any sprocket spring
Will tickle me, young Barrister
Who's future I may get to sing;
Ye’ll listen as I plead, good Sir.

You think this grand ship runs on air?
Yew’ve got them all down, save but nine.
We pillage and plunder for fare,
The upkeep this beast is a crime.

So here’s what we’re going to do
In the storm that comes from the east.
When ye hear “turn the rudder due!”
We make for the deluge’ release.

I’ll set the course “high elevate”
And level o’er Sydney O-Z.
I spy with my glass, liners eight,
The crew goes, there’ll be more for me.

Surprised what our tactics will be:
We’ll drop to their decks filled balloons      
Of milk of magnesia with tea;
They won’t know what hit, the buffoons!

I’ll spiral from under the brink,
To land the crew on the first deck.
Relieve the chis’lers of their chink,
Then ferry the men** to the next!

(**And full as a tick on a flea )

Before the end, we’re up the flume;
No better way to find doubloons!
Now gone are the days of griddl’ing,
Belt up! Next stop! Man in the Moon!

Copyright©️2018 Jade Pandora. All Rights Reserved.
Written by Jade-Pandora (jade tiger)
Published | Edited 31st May 2018
Author's Note
Written for and entered in the DUP competition "Steampunk - The Barrister's Clock."
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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