It Was Complicated

Approaching infinity, it was a long way,
The approach that is, and the distance,
Like a Jumbo needing room to land,
And take off, vice-versa actually

She took her top off, quite casually,
Said "gee it's hot in here", or did she
Say that first, then remove her top?
It mattered not, she was topless

My worshiping at her feet, did not
Impress her, she said "arise fool!"
I did, glad I had it in the right order,
This time, supposedly, and that ...

I had placed her on a pedestal,
Most unfairly it would seem,
She deserved to be up there, I thought
Wrongly apparently, as in a dream

She fell of course and crushed me
That must have been my plan,
Subconsciously, the shame again,
Of who I am, and who I can never be