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Candle lit acrimoniousness - in collaboration with sooterella

"six shots later
and i'm still looking at my hands
trying to remember
what it felt like to hold you"
- (unknown)

to be held...

addiction
a whisper rushing over me
your fingers play the music
of my exposed spine
like a february breeze through wind chimes

i tried to catch your hand
kiss your spirit
a funeral kite with a string of roses
but you had already left me
like a fever
drained, weepy
wondering if i just imagined you
to wound myself
to see if i could still part
dream veils like willows, a song toying softly with my hair
outside, the world is burning
but why should i care?

can i still find muse on something other than bedsheets and back seats, find meaning in more
than the fading maps of scars?

don't answer that

claustrophobic ceilings
and the mystery of the stars
shadows on your sleeping face
creep like creatures
in an undiscovered ocean bottom
only my curiosity can reach
still,

i wonder what is down there
trying to escape thoughts
of another mouth fused to yours
feeding on love is misery
left behind by a disowned rag doll

i imagine mermaid mummies preserved in salt, a gaping
hell-mouth maybe
guarded by monsters of legend
i call by their true names
a haunted howling universe
waiting for my trident's
metallic grind
stardust into sand,
candy sticky skulls to cocaine,
declaring genocide,
mass extinction, no exceptions
against the bulging eyed
grey brained humanoid things
that talk and sing and type and say nothing
then call us the animals

suck the feeling from my soul,
sweet sickened sisters
eat my flesh to bone
make of me a god ravenous enough, jealous enough
to swallow them whole
they can not dream in my belly
unevolving, corroding
like machine arteries
and worker bees on engines,
chipped out of tune doll puppets
pulled by strings of expectation
joyless smiling faces
that once sang of a small, small world of laughter and tears,
tiny hopes and giant fears

a younger, more innocent me would say the clouds
hang there, waiting 'neath the sea, to feel my skin
our world twisted into symphony
an infinity symbol even,
but now everything is empty as a bathtub, cold
when my girl hands clutch the faucet lamely and my dripping face melts me
like winter into rain
everything has a drain, a heartbeat
that's just begging

to be unplugged

but I just can't seem to stop this electricity
this foul mouthed conspiracy
undulating against the fair remnants
of your sent mingled with our cries
still damp on my couch
like we only yesterday
kissed in the rain
and made love deeper
than any aching seraph
barreling into the coy hindsight
of spring addled thunderstorms

I hope you drown
with a parched mouth
latched to the begging of a cruel pouty lip
a succinct violin
beckoning tight owl flocks
to fall in cadence
atop of accursed grave moss
laced with a moon childs larva tears
and a putrid poets forever lost
ode to Crowley
in a feathered night untouched by Ishtar
and the heart shaped lunacy
carved into to the tar infested pores
of your skin

caraphernelia
says it all
and fuck
I fucking tried
I really did
but I've been lovin
the scratches on the bottom of my gypsy feet
a good long minute
it seems


Written by kourtnissixxx
Published
Author's Note
Written in collaboration with an immaculate poet and a personal best friend of mine <3 may she forever shine
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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