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deepundergroundpoetry.com
take me dont just tease me
lying in bed with you
i can hear the rain
the wind blowing through the open window in the room
your t-shirt and lace booty shorts
you take the blankets and cover me
such a sweet gesture
and then i feel you slowly begin to rub me
taunting my pussy lips
making it crave you completely
as u move them to the side and dip a.finger in tasting my need for the erection i now.feel pressed against me . take me daddy dont just tease me .
i can hear the rain
the wind blowing through the open window in the room
your t-shirt and lace booty shorts
you take the blankets and cover me
such a sweet gesture
and then i feel you slowly begin to rub me
taunting my pussy lips
making it crave you completely
as u move them to the side and dip a.finger in tasting my need for the erection i now.feel pressed against me . take me daddy dont just tease me .
Published 22nd Mar 2018
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 9
reading list entries 2
comments 11
reads 995
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22nd Mar 2018 6:59am
Inspired this rhyming summary:
Take me, don't just tease me;
Don't let your grip release me
Until you've given all you've got
To make the bed and both us hot.
Take me, don't just tease me;
Don't let your grip release me
Until you've given all you've got
To make the bed and both us hot.
22nd Mar 2018 7:41am
23rd Mar 2018 9:05am
25th Mar 2018 5:44am
26th Mar 2018 10:39pm
30th Mar 2018 5:49am
You have to Love a woman who knows what she wants
I love the scene setting then right into eroticism.
I'm eager to explore more of your works
Sandman
I love the scene setting then right into eroticism.
I'm eager to explore more of your works
Sandman
5th May 2018 6:12am
I will say negatives, and the positives. I personally recommend you take out the period between "a" and "finger"; and between "now" and "feel". Also, if you split:
"as u move them to the side and dip a.finger in/
tasting my need for the erection/"
the poem would flow much smoother. I love the action of rubbing and imagery of pussy lips and booty shorts and rain. I can really picture that as if I was in a dark bedroom in San Diego in Coronado! Jea! I love the seduction at the end! Any man would! Good poem! And I would recommend colorful imagery! Keep at it you good poet you! Hope life is wellos Amari!
"as u move them to the side and dip a.finger in/
tasting my need for the erection/"
the poem would flow much smoother. I love the action of rubbing and imagery of pussy lips and booty shorts and rain. I can really picture that as if I was in a dark bedroom in San Diego in Coronado! Jea! I love the seduction at the end! Any man would! Good poem! And I would recommend colorful imagery! Keep at it you good poet you! Hope life is wellos Amari!
11th May 2018 11:16pm
19th Oct 2018 4:05am
5th Feb 2020 1:12am
5th Feb 2020 6:53am
