deepundergroundpoetry.com
To the Man I Once Called Daddy,
They say a daughter’s first love his her dad.
They’ll tell you it’s the greatest love you’ve ever had.
Sadly, no one told me there were men like you.
The kind that yell at mommy and hit her too.
The kind that sings boldly in the church pew, but when no one’s looking, he touches you.
Daddy, remember that night pops died?
I remember when you laid at the foot of my bed and cried.
Daddy, I know you have demons like we all do,
but don’t you realize my demon was you?
Taken by lights of blue and red,
those memories would replay over and over in my head.
Daddy, what happens to good memories when the bad ones invade?
I don’t know what this means, but mommy says you just want to get laid?
Daddy, what does that mean?! Are you sleepy?! I’m sleepy too,
but the nightmares of all the things I’ve seen return
and I don’t know what to do.
Daddy, where are you?!
I’m 13 now daddy, it’s been two years. I haven’t seen you since the night of the tears.
Mommy gave me a man who became my father of new.
He didn’t like to hurt me, unlike you.
He loves me with all his heart and nothing could tear us apart.
I’m 14 now daddy and my english teacher wants us to do a family tree
what do I say when the tree doesn’t just end with me?
daddy, you were the vine that sucked the life out of our family.
I’m 16 now daddy and just the thought of sex terrifies me. everyone calls me a nun, guess it’s better than being easy.
Daddy, did you not know how much pain you would cause?
If the devil watched us like a soap, he’d applause.
Swirls of anger fester inside, my happiness is now much like the tide.
Waves of anxiety crash down on me
with blades in my back as numbered as the fish in the sea.
Why couldn’t you love me like a real dad would? Now a hole in my heart replaces where you once stood.
Daddy, you are no longer daddy. your name is now replaced with sperm-donor. No longer yours don’t even ask for a phone number. No trace of you in the court of law, you’re just a man who raised me, that’s all.
-What was once yours
They’ll tell you it’s the greatest love you’ve ever had.
Sadly, no one told me there were men like you.
The kind that yell at mommy and hit her too.
The kind that sings boldly in the church pew, but when no one’s looking, he touches you.
Daddy, remember that night pops died?
I remember when you laid at the foot of my bed and cried.
Daddy, I know you have demons like we all do,
but don’t you realize my demon was you?
Taken by lights of blue and red,
those memories would replay over and over in my head.
Daddy, what happens to good memories when the bad ones invade?
I don’t know what this means, but mommy says you just want to get laid?
Daddy, what does that mean?! Are you sleepy?! I’m sleepy too,
but the nightmares of all the things I’ve seen return
and I don’t know what to do.
Daddy, where are you?!
I’m 13 now daddy, it’s been two years. I haven’t seen you since the night of the tears.
Mommy gave me a man who became my father of new.
He didn’t like to hurt me, unlike you.
He loves me with all his heart and nothing could tear us apart.
I’m 14 now daddy and my english teacher wants us to do a family tree
what do I say when the tree doesn’t just end with me?
daddy, you were the vine that sucked the life out of our family.
I’m 16 now daddy and just the thought of sex terrifies me. everyone calls me a nun, guess it’s better than being easy.
Daddy, did you not know how much pain you would cause?
If the devil watched us like a soap, he’d applause.
Swirls of anger fester inside, my happiness is now much like the tide.
Waves of anxiety crash down on me
with blades in my back as numbered as the fish in the sea.
Why couldn’t you love me like a real dad would? Now a hole in my heart replaces where you once stood.
Daddy, you are no longer daddy. your name is now replaced with sperm-donor. No longer yours don’t even ask for a phone number. No trace of you in the court of law, you’re just a man who raised me, that’s all.
-What was once yours
Published 5th Mar 2018
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11th Mar 2018 9:20pm
This is one of the most honest and heartbreaking poem I've read on this site. I hope this isn't based off of personal experience, but if it is I'm so sorry that you had to go through it. I hope that you've managed to find some form of peace, but I know that the hole your father left in your heart will never be filled it.
Great work!
Great work!
Great work! The only suggestion I would make is in the line "I’m 16 now daddy and just the thought of sex terrifies me. everyone calls me a nun, guess it’s better than being easy." is to use a slant rhyme of nun & one by saying "everyone calls me a nun, it's better than being the easy one." Love your heartbreaking poem, keep up the good work!
17th Mar 2018 9:28am
very sad , so much pain within these words.. i can tell from these words, just how much you wanted your dad to be there for you . you have expressed this so well and you are very brave to share this with us. just sorry if this is personal,
26th Mar 2018 3:19pm
I am sorry that you had to go through such a heinous episode of life, but I am awe inspired by you seeing the brave and strong human you have become. Stay same! Keep sharing:)
2nd May 2018 4:49pm
I have truly been touched by your poem. I felt your words and now pray for you.
You have a true father and he will not harm you or forsake you!
His love for you was before our beginning and will be for eternity.
I pray you have come to know him.
Here is a letter from him.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJvqmhGs1Y8
You have a true father and he will not harm you or forsake you!
His love for you was before our beginning and will be for eternity.
I pray you have come to know him.
Here is a letter from him.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zJvqmhGs1Y8
21st May 2018 3:20pm
28th Aug 2018 1:54am
sad poem but u could poemize ur this versions this one consider pl
'''yours......if silence is just the absence of sound, and darkness is just the absence of light, then hate is merely just the absence of love. this is why one must love his enemies. even when you prefer the silence and the dark, the absence of love not only kills off joy and happiness, but it also extinguish the emotional flames inside of your heart. The absence of emotion is state of being numb. when you are without feeling, you aren’t living anymore. you are simply existing. (( I write to bring you emotion. )) ''''''impressive i think
hate could be replaced by LUST
'''yours......if silence is just the absence of sound, and darkness is just the absence of light, then hate is merely just the absence of love. this is why one must love his enemies. even when you prefer the silence and the dark, the absence of love not only kills off joy and happiness, but it also extinguish the emotional flames inside of your heart. The absence of emotion is state of being numb. when you are without feeling, you aren’t living anymore. you are simply existing. (( I write to bring you emotion. )) ''''''impressive i think
hate could be replaced by LUST
15th Jan 2020 4:46am
