10 Steps Backward

Turning around is the only way forward
If only it meant going back in time
Undoing the error of my ways
But every step forward takes ten steps back
No matter how hard I try, how forcefully I walk
The straight line I travel bends around in a circle
Over and over I put one foot in front of the other
Yet my bones twist until they snap and I am further away
I can't understand how it happens every single time
Adding up to an overwhelming undeniable truth
God hates me, God tortures me, God is a fucking asshole!
Send me to Hell now, God dam you!
Just kill me and get it the fuck over with
Why draw this out any more?  
I'm going to Hell already, just fucking do it!
I don't need any more convincing
I have enough nails through my wrists and feet
Been poisoned with enough poison to kill ten elephants
Burned alive into a pile of ashes
Buried in a coffin filled with flesh eating worms
I'm never going to forgive you for all you've done to me
So what are you waiting for God?
Are you so sadistic you don't want to end my misery?
Do you shoot wads of cum with every teardrop I shed?
Does my pain ad suffering bring you laughter?
Is it you or me that is not real?
I'm so tired of this shit!