Dreaming of Yesterday

I met my mother's sister in South Korea.  I had just walked off the plane when I recognized her waiting in the lobby of the terminal.  She was beaming and excited to see me.  I walked up to her and gave her a deep hug and began to cry.  She was the only family I had left.  I was her only family now too.

I spoke in a whisper, "I'm sorry I couldn't come sooner.  Mom died peacefully."

My aunt just nodded and got some tissues out of her purse for both of us.  Quickly we dried our eyes and headed for the luggage carousel.  After we got our bags, we caught a taxi and headed to my aunt's home a little ways from Seoul.  It was late at night when we finally relaxed in the spare bedroom she had.

I sighed deeply, "Mom I still miss you.  It was a shock to find all those poems.  I hope your sister can handle them."

I got ready for a small Korean dinner with my aunt and headed to the kitchen.  I found her there preparing bibimbap and kimchi for us to eat together.  We both smiled trying to be strong for each other.  After dinner I went to my room and grabbed the box full of her poems and pictures and brought them to Kyung Nim.  She nodded and opened the box and glanced through old pictures of mom and smiled.  When she got to those of mom where she was sickly she began to cry uncontrollably.  I tried to hug and comfort her.  Then she calmed down and finally found the poems mom had left for her.

I smiled and sniffled back some tears, "That last year she wrote a lot.  She thought about you so much Kyung Nim.  She wanted to come back and see you so many times."

She nodded, "I miss her so much.  After she left for America with that man.  I knew she would never come home again."

I nodded knowing that my father was that man she had despised.  Mom told me how her sister begged and pleaded for her to stay, but she had made up her mind.  This falling out between them kept them separated till her death.  This was mom's biggest regret, now I was here with mom's last words.

Kyung Nim looked through a few sijo poems and settled on one in particular.  After reading it through she began to cry and ask for forgiveness from her dead sister.

          Dearest sister,

          I am well for the moment,
          I remember our childhood.
          The forest where we dreamed,
          I was happy to chase sparrows.
          What sorrow fills this broken heart,
          a lone sparrow sings no more.