Irony

There is such an irony in death
You can only then
Achieve full admiration of those you've strived to please
Everyone paints you with their pretty words
A mosaic for the spectators ears
No one speaks about the bad or the ugly in a person
Those are kept unspoken after death
For once, even after life
You are loved and accepted
Understood
If I leave this place,
If I leave you alone on this earth
What would you have to say in my honor
Would you dress me up
Like a decorated hero
Tell everyone how I saved the world
How it was such a universal tragedy
That I was now long gone
Perhaps not
You might veer towards a more
Modest approach
Simply say that I was a kind soul
A loving daughter and mother
And beloved friend and colleague
If there is one thing I can ask of you
After I'm gone
Just tell them all who I truly was
Tell them my story
Tell them our story
Don't leave out anything
I won't be worried about saving face
Not where I'll be
I would love for everyone to hear
How hard I've fought just to skate by
Everyday
How I felt that nothing would ever
Erase the smudged marks from my past
That my heart and hope we're desolate and broken
I had not felt I had a home
In what seemed a very long time
I thought everyone would profit
From my absence
Honestly
That I couldn't take one more day
Of feeling that I was not worth it
I have sinned
I have walked in the limelight
I have loved
I have lost
I have more than paid for my mistakes
And my heart was filled with only good intentions
At the end of the day
I don't care if the world thought I was wonderful
As long as you did