deepundergroundpoetry.com
Hooked
What is the strongest drug in all of mankind
Without any doubt I much stronger then weed
What meth herion its pure child's play
One taste of me I promise forever u are mine
Their is nothing more powerful then what I will do to your mind
Whatever i ask
your powerless don't eve don't try
I've been around longer and touched and destroyed more lives then any of your street drugs your worthless money can buy
From the strongest to the weakest
From the richest to the poorest none are ammune to my Devine high I am coveted by all who try
I can be the best or worse thing that you will ever try
you think the things I say can't possibly be true . But I am willing to bet your looking for me now you don't even know it. But I'm always in the back of your mind
If you use me right I promise I'll treat you right but beware if you abuse me it is you who will be in despair try and try to run and hide not even in your dreams can u hide
I can turn your best friend into your worst enemy trust me that's easy have you heard of me yet my name it's so easy
So easy to say and so hard to forget you can find me almost anywhere keep your money
I'm one thing you can never buy although many have tried.
For I am LOVE THE most powerful drug in all of man kind .....
Without any doubt I much stronger then weed
What meth herion its pure child's play
One taste of me I promise forever u are mine
Their is nothing more powerful then what I will do to your mind
Whatever i ask
your powerless don't eve don't try
I've been around longer and touched and destroyed more lives then any of your street drugs your worthless money can buy
From the strongest to the weakest
From the richest to the poorest none are ammune to my Devine high I am coveted by all who try
I can be the best or worse thing that you will ever try
you think the things I say can't possibly be true . But I am willing to bet your looking for me now you don't even know it. But I'm always in the back of your mind
If you use me right I promise I'll treat you right but beware if you abuse me it is you who will be in despair try and try to run and hide not even in your dreams can u hide
I can turn your best friend into your worst enemy trust me that's easy have you heard of me yet my name it's so easy
So easy to say and so hard to forget you can find me almost anywhere keep your money
I'm one thing you can never buy although many have tried.
For I am LOVE THE most powerful drug in all of man kind .....
Published 13th Jan 2018
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 4
reading list entries 0
comments 8
reads 602
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
13th Jan 2018 7:22am
13th Jan 2018 7:28am
13th Jan 2018 7:31am
Thats a....its good...holy shit...makes me horny in a weird sort of unprofessional way...make me a sandwich type of...holy shit
13th Jan 2018 7:43am
There is no wrong or right way to feel about it. only that u feel anything at all then it done something right
Although horny was not what I was expecting and that's pretty bad ass lol
Although horny was not what I was expecting and that's pretty bad ass lol
13th Jan 2018 9:01am
bruh you guys all put so much effort to this poems like honestly i just write down some story in like 10 min and post it. props to you
13th Jan 2018 11:20am
Anonymous
- Edited 14th Oct 2018 4:47am
14th Jan 2018 1:19pm
<< post removed >>
Honest Critique is just my opinion! It is no big ass " knows everything" bullshit.
1. So look you need to sort out the little things firstly...
Then and Than (these are two different words with two different meanings.)
When you use the wrong one the entire line you wrote means something else!
Check it out...
Then... https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/then
Than...
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/than
2. Rather than using a abbreviation, if you write the word then you won't stop your reader's eye at that point (which ruins your timing) example "u" or "you".
3. If you add punctuation to questions or two part sentences when you read them, they read quicker. This is especially useful in the first couple of lines; it gets the reader's attention and draws them in. Example your line 1. Will love a question mark at the end of "mankind?" And line 2 will flow better with a comma between..."doubt I, much"
For a second write, this is brilliant. I hope you find the critique helpful and that it helps you with future writes.
Cheers
Al
1. So look you need to sort out the little things firstly...
Then and Than (these are two different words with two different meanings.)
When you use the wrong one the entire line you wrote means something else!
Check it out...
Then... https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/then
Than...
https://dictionary.cambridge.org/dictionary/english/than
2. Rather than using a abbreviation, if you write the word then you won't stop your reader's eye at that point (which ruins your timing) example "u" or "you".
3. If you add punctuation to questions or two part sentences when you read them, they read quicker. This is especially useful in the first couple of lines; it gets the reader's attention and draws them in. Example your line 1. Will love a question mark at the end of "mankind?" And line 2 will flow better with a comma between..."doubt I, much"
For a second write, this is brilliant. I hope you find the critique helpful and that it helps you with future writes.
Cheers
Al
