Freak

Brace yourself
Hold on
Are you sure you are up for this?
I am not normal
I have not lived a normal life
Well what the hell is normal now a days?
I dont know I am not sure but I am not it, I am not that
Face myself
It was hard to look at times
Hard to see past the bitter memories that still go bump in the night
If i dont think then they wont exist wait dont turn off the light
So brace yourself
Embrace myself
There are days I am up, so high up I can twirl my fingers in clouds a make designs like the curly haired red headed girl that makes my lattes
I am up
There are days I am low, so low that i feel useless, a waste of space and consider myself a target for anyone who wants a piece of me that day, they can have their way
What can i say
I was never normal
My moodswings are so insane at times i give myself whiplash not to mention how it flings others around in my path
A beautiful disaster
Are you sure you are up for this?
You love me, every part of me
What did I miss?
Ive never had this before
Forgive me its something im getting use to
Acceptance for every part of me, even the martering condescending sarcastic chip on my shoulder parts
Chip chip chip
I promise im not crazy
I love you, for everything you are and everything you stand for
But mostly because of how you look at me
You see me as normal
You are up for this arent you?
When the top goes up and the lions dance and im left in the center ring with a spot light on me there you sit in the front row, smiling
I’m a freak this i know
I am not normal
I have not lived a normal life
Well what the hell is normal now a days?
I love you
Please stay
I’m used to things going away
Like the rain, its so dry here
So brace yourself
Hold on
When i love i dont let go
I love you you know