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Is it future, or is it past?

I was sinking with you
On top of my shoulders
So I let you go
And allowed myself †
To finally swim free

I was sinking with you
I thought I was strong enough
To host us both †
I'd boast the role of shelter
To your inevitable pain †
That endless rain
When all your hope †
Came crashing down
I'd play the clown †
And try and turn that frown †
Into a slightly more smiley position †
You were never an imposition †
 
I'd always sit to listen †
To all your indecisions
And all of the flavors †
That they came in
But the depths †
Of this toxic
Relationship †
Was overwhelming †
I couldn't keep us †
Both from drowning †
 
I'd spend forever †
Playing the umbrella †
Trying to shelter †
You from your pain
I almost forgot what it felt like †
To deal with my own rain
 
And when your rain came
And took aim at me
And you took a can of petrol †
Figuratively †
And burned the Bridge to friendship
Literally †
It's not like I didn't †
See your storm coming from a mile away
Over time I'd seen your pointless anger
Your kneejerk reactions
Destroy so many friendships
That I kinda just got used to it
 We all kinda got used to it

We tiptoed around your insecurities
And tried to accommodate
Your anxieties
And tried to alleviate
Your Suicidal Tendencies
And then you basically
Turned on me and we
With your words
 
Your words
Miss representing me
Your words
Trying to turn people against we
Your words
Eagerly
Eating away at me
Ripping at my skin
Leaving me to bleed
Out
Making me doubt
My own character
My ethics
Am I so full of bull shit
That even I canít see
What is clearly
Obvious to you
But not me?
You
You checked yourself into †
The heroes quarters
And vilified my every step †
While I sat there †
Refusing to elevate you †
To the list of my regrets
I'd rather put you on a shelf †
With all the things I'd rather forget
 
But I ain't upset
Not anymore
These feelings ain't raw
No more tears will fall †
On this bloodstained floor
And as you continue to push
And try to get me to bite
I flat out refuse
To engage in your fight
I wonít feed your screen grabs
So you can tell others that youíre right
And you won't be on my mind
When I can't sleep tonight
 
Now
This poem isn't dedicated †
To just one of you
But this IS dedicated to many of you †
So to you from me and we
From the bottom of our hearts †
Regardless of the past
We just wanna say

Alright!
We hope you're doing alright?
We hope you find the happiness †
You're looking for in life †
But at the same time
You're still a bunch of dick heads
And you can go fuck yourselves
Bridge818
Written by Bridge818
Published
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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