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Is it future, or is it past?

I was sinking with you
On top of my shoulders  
So I let you go
And allowed myself  
To finally swim free

I was sinking with you
I thought I was strong enough
To host us both  
I'd boast the role of shelter
To your inevitable pain  
That endless rain
When all your hope  
Came crashing down
I'd play the clown  
And try and turn that frown  
Into a slightly more smiley position  
You were never an imposition  
 
I'd always sit to listen  
To all your indecisions
And all of the flavors  
That they came in
But the depths  
Of this toxic
Relationship  
Was overwhelming  
I couldn't keep us  
Both from drowning  
 
I'd spend forever  
Playing the umbrella  
Trying to shelter  
You from your pain
I almost forgot what it felt like  
To deal with my own rain
 
And when your rain came
And took aim at me
And you took a can of petrol  
Figuratively  
And burned the Bridge to friendship
Literally  
It's not like I didn't  
See your storm coming from a mile away
Over time I'd seen your pointless anger
Your kneejerk reactions
Destroy so many friendships
That I kinda just got used to it
 We all kinda got used to it

We tiptoed around your insecurities
And tried to accommodate
Your anxieties
And tried to alleviate
Your Suicidal Tendencies
And then you basically
Turned on me and we
With your words
 
Your words
Miss representing me
Your words
Trying to turn people against we
Your words
Eagerly
Eating away at me
Ripping at my skin
Leaving me to bleed
Out
Making me doubt
My own character
My ethics
Am I so full of bull shit
That even I can’t see
What is clearly
Obvious to you
But not me?
You
You checked yourself into  
The heroes quarters
And vilified my every step  
While I sat there  
Refusing to elevate you  
To the list of my regrets
I'd rather put you on a shelf  
With all the things I'd rather forget
 
But I ain't upset
Not anymore
These feelings ain't raw
No more tears will fall  
On this bloodstained floor
And as you continue to push
And try to get me to bite
I flat out refuse
To engage in your fight
I won’t feed your screen grabs
So you can tell others that you’re right
And you won't be on my mind
When I can't sleep tonight
 
Now
This poem isn't dedicated  
To just one of you
But this IS dedicated to many of you  
So to you from me and we
From the bottom of our hearts  
Regardless of the past
We just wanna say

Alright!
We hope you're doing alright?
We hope you find the happiness  
You're looking for in life  
But at the same time
You're still a bunch of dick heads
And you can go fuck yourselves
Written by Bridge818
Published
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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