Being Dead Has Its Benefits 7.0

(i)  
 
Being Dead has  
It’s benefits:  
You never ever  
Have to speak  
To a call center  
In Pakistan  
About something  
That you and they  
Know nothing about  
 
(ii)  
 
Being Dead has  
It’s benefits:  
The dead never  
Have to go to  
The toilet and  
Never suffer  
From itchy bum  
syndrome  
 
(iii)  
 
Being Dead has  
It’s benefits:  
You no longer  
Have to worry  
About Heaven,  
Hell or the  
Afterlife  
 
(iv)
 
Being Dead has  
It’s benefits:  
For the first  
Time you don’t  
Have to pay  
Any bills  
Or tip annoying  
Waiters  
 
(v)  
 
Being Dead has  
It’s benefits:  
You never have to  
Pick up dog shit  
And wipe your  
Dogs ass after  
It takes a dump  
 
(vi)  
 
Being Dead has  
It’s benefits:  
You can fart  
In an elevator  
And there is no  
Way anyone is  
Gonna know  
It was you  
 
(vii)  
 
Being Dead has  
It’s benefits:  
I no longer  
Have to pretend  
To like you or  
be your friend