deepundergroundpoetry.com

Alex in wonderland

Down through the rabbit hole,
The last call, the last time
Id ever hear her voice
The time had come
She'd made her choice
Pull the plug, yank the tube
She's ready to go
Say goodbye
And I love you too
 
Deeper past the tiny shelves,
Two weeks has passed
In two weeks late
Not joyous or happy
Driving down the interstate
To tell him the news,  
At one in the morning
Because I couldn't wait
 
Empty jar of marmalade,
There's a car at his house
Parked right next to his
In my spot, but not mine
There's a pair of ripped skinny jeans
Strewn across the passenger side
The beat quickens my heart races
The world is spinning around me
As my stride paces
 
Sticks and leaves at the bottom,
I mouse around the corner
I tiptoe to his sill
I hear the sound of a voice
It's high pitched and shrill
It lowers into a sigh
A laugh, that's not mine
 
Drowning in a pool of my own tears,
I call him, I announce my presence
Here we are
The moment I've dreaded
His face pressed against mine
angry words
Turning time
I've lost it
This is the end
Nothing will ever mend
 
The caucus race,
I speed home
Racing like a charging hawk
Think about what's to come
Remember I'm the mouse
Remember the last talk
Remember the last talk
Remember the last talk
I am the mouse he was the hawk
I'd got it all wrong
But the pills are now gone
Swallowed its too late
Still running in his race
 
Go fetch my gloves and fan,
I'm in a building
That was never my own
The nurses they check me
Take my blood
I'm in no zone
I am no one  
I am nothing
I am a name on a chalkboard
Outside of a room
 
Drink me
I fell for the same tricks again
I am lost, not found
I am unrequited love
Forever bound
I walk alone
Skin and bone
I am all the muscles that make me
Sewn together with good intentions
Stitched loosely like the fabric
Of my life
Being torn apart
Being rifled with strife
 
Into wonderland
I seek help
I know I need  
Everything I can get
drink it in, let it wet my lips
So dry and parched
Like my lungs screaming
Sound of nothing
White noise streaming
Over the loudspeakers  
In my head
With these pills
At least I won't end up dead
 
How fitting it seem
That when I left
My head was messed
And Alice's Adventures in Wonderland
Lay open on my desk
Written by Alxh07
Published | Edited 20th Oct 2017
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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