Playing Pictionary With the Clouds

Is it wrong that i only see karma sutra positions when i look at the cloud shapes?

Kewl poem btw.

LOL only you Arty, only you. Your visits bring smiles, thanks.

Loved this ! I do it all the time with my young boys.
Thank you for my smile today

Glad you you liked it. Sometimes the kids see more than us. Small eyes yet big imaginations.                   Thanks, Rags

clouds write their own poetry
i've always enjoyed their mood swings..

just as i enjoyed the vibe of this poem
it left me with a good feeling

Absolutely, and if one only watches there's another just beyond. Glad this was able to brighten your day.    

Thanks for the visit and kind comment, their always appreciated.

Used to plat cloud busting with my kids and star gazing - really happy memories - thanks for stirring them :-)

Huge Hugs :-)

Glad this brought some smiles, David. Good memories with kids are cherished.    

Thanks for stopping by and giving me one of those smiles.

Amazing what beauty, nature brings us when we all just pay close attention to it.

It was a wonderous piece :)

So correct your words. Nature can be both entertaining and informative if we just pay attention. Thanks for the visit and wise comment.

"Their antics are quite fun    
We've all discovered this    
teasing mind and eye    
and leaving us in bliss    
 
For if you are like me    
you've surly found it true    
they only come to play    
when sky is showing blue "

priceless. the expression.

leave us in a bliss. they indeed do.

astute observation.
apt expression.


Antoine is still doing
a fine job
of brightening up the
memory space.

Expression.

Insight.

job.

Mother Nature, tickling the imagination and feeding the heart & soul when we stop to watch and listen, drinking in all she offers us.    
 
 
The visit and kind comments warming.

dearest Amorous One
this is delightfullly done
I can imagine your beloved Antoine
among the clouds that shape themselves
for your joy & happiness..

this brought me smiles today :)

love Crim

My Lady Crim, thank you for the kind words, they meant a lot to me. I spent some time over the week-end and found the picture and will incorporate it later if possible.  

I am honored it brought you smiles, writing it brought the same to me.  

Teri

aw lovely Teri picturing your beloved pooch
playing among the clouds
so you may again see him  
brought tears to my eyes..

~Raven

So good to see you back. Yes, a tear here also at times when I think of him, but many joys remembered also. Was just glad a camera was handy when he visited us. Tears right now of both joy and sadness.  
Many others have graced us since he passed, my current shadow, a long haired black Lab. (google "Ashland Labradors") to see photos of what she looks like, though not her, looks just like her from pup to now.  

Thank you Raven for visiting and the kind comment.

I read this poem last week and have been meaning to come back to leave my thoughts, and after flying kites on the weekend I remembered!  I thought your poem was wonderfully delightful.  The rhyming scheme and your choice in rhyming words is excellent and subtle, giving the poem great flow without taking anything away from the beautiful imagery and uplifting vibe.

The only constructive feedback I could offer you is to consider not using the word "as" to start a line, because the word is unnecessary and doesn't serve any purpose except being superglue for poets to connect two lines.  Avoid using the word "as" by replacing it with a more suitable verb or adjective.  Below is an example of how the stanza could be written:

"Weary is my body
resting on the grass
gazing at the clouds
slowly swirling when they pass"

I'll leave you with a quote, something I think every good poet should swear an oath to live by...

“Immature poets imitate; mature poets steal; bad poets deface what they take, and good poets make it into something better, or at least something different.”    
    
― T.S. Eliot, The Sacred Wood

I think you're a good poet, Teri. :)

Alexander, I thank you so much for your time and effort spent on this critique, it is exactly what I was looking for, and understand the reasoning behind your feedback. I have changed the first stanza as you suggested with only a minor change in the last line, for I felt it a better fit than "when".      
No, I removed both as', yet moved an "as" from the first line of the second stanza and replaced it with "like".  :-)  In doing so, I've noticed the change sets up the different syllable counts going into the second stanza, thus improving the rhythm also.     
       
The quote you left is very fitting, and I will certainly keep it in mind. "I hereby swear.............", though not wishing to become completely mature, I only took that which was offered.  :-)      
     
You have probably noticed why I wished to write this myself, since we both had the same idea from the question you posted. It has a deep meaning for me as you can see from the picture. Again, Thank You for your graciousness in allowing me to do so.     
       
Your last line humbles me greatly and is deeply appreciated.  Teri