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deepundergroundpoetry.com
Nursery Crimes 5.6
(i)
my thoughts are blue, suck my willie
for sex I am keen
pretend I’m the king , suck my willie
fucking the Queen!
lift up your skirt, suck my willie
show me ass crack
a paddle I’ll get, suck my willie
and give you a whack
lets lie in the hay, suck my willie
take my cock out
now climb on top, fuck my willie
ride me and pout.
(ii)
Betty Botter lubed with butter
But, she said, that butter is much better
If I put it in my pussy
It will make my pussy juicy
But a bit of KY jelly
Would make my Nellie far more smelly
(iii)
Eeny, meeny, miny, moe
bend her over and have a go
If she hollers, go man go!
Eeny, meeny, anal, Ho
(iv)
Cum drips out your mouth and nose
mouth and nose
suck my penis and it grows
stiff it grows
And
I cum in your eyes, ears, mouth and nose
but mainly in your mouth and nose
mouth and nose
ass and thighs, twat and tits
twat and tits
I want to lick and suck your bits
suck your bits
and
you’ll come like your having epileptic fits
let me cum over your tits
fuck them tits
ass and thighs, balls and dick
balls and dick
give my dick a raunchy lick
suck and lick
and
I’ll fuck you with my supersonic prick
Hump until my cock is sick
Cock real thick
(v)
Humpty Dumpty wiggled his ass
Humpty Dumpty farted out gas
All the king's horses and all the King's men
fucked his ass again and again.
Humpty Dumpty’s got a sore ass
Humpty Dumpty still made a pass
At all the king's horses and all the King's men
who buggered his ass again and again.
Humpty Dumpty likes oral sex
cock in his mouth is what he wants next
All the king's horses and all the King's men
came in his mouth again and again.
Humpty Dumpty now has a rash
to the clinic he had to dash
All the king's horses and all the King's men
didn’t want to fuck him again
my thoughts are blue, suck my willie
for sex I am keen
pretend I’m the king , suck my willie
fucking the Queen!
lift up your skirt, suck my willie
show me ass crack
a paddle I’ll get, suck my willie
and give you a whack
lets lie in the hay, suck my willie
take my cock out
now climb on top, fuck my willie
ride me and pout.
(ii)
Betty Botter lubed with butter
But, she said, that butter is much better
If I put it in my pussy
It will make my pussy juicy
But a bit of KY jelly
Would make my Nellie far more smelly
(iii)
Eeny, meeny, miny, moe
bend her over and have a go
If she hollers, go man go!
Eeny, meeny, anal, Ho
(iv)
Cum drips out your mouth and nose
mouth and nose
suck my penis and it grows
stiff it grows
And
I cum in your eyes, ears, mouth and nose
but mainly in your mouth and nose
mouth and nose
ass and thighs, twat and tits
twat and tits
I want to lick and suck your bits
suck your bits
and
you’ll come like your having epileptic fits
let me cum over your tits
fuck them tits
ass and thighs, balls and dick
balls and dick
give my dick a raunchy lick
suck and lick
and
I’ll fuck you with my supersonic prick
Hump until my cock is sick
Cock real thick
(v)
Humpty Dumpty wiggled his ass
Humpty Dumpty farted out gas
All the king's horses and all the King's men
fucked his ass again and again.
Humpty Dumpty’s got a sore ass
Humpty Dumpty still made a pass
At all the king's horses and all the King's men
who buggered his ass again and again.
Humpty Dumpty likes oral sex
cock in his mouth is what he wants next
All the king's horses and all the King's men
came in his mouth again and again.
Humpty Dumpty now has a rash
to the clinic he had to dash
All the king's horses and all the King's men
didn’t want to fuck him again
Published 19th Sep 2017
| Edited 25th Sep 2017
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
likes 10
reading list entries 1
comments 24
reads 778
Commenting Preference:
The author encourages honest critique.
19th Sep 2017 5:48pm
You still got it, lol. Probably going to have to start over soon and right them differently. Such a great little series, laughing with you for sure.
Thank you for the write.
Thank you for the write.
20th Sep 2017 3:34am
thank you - I am running out of nursery rhymes maybe enough for two more sets - next might be classical childrens stories - not sure yet - I'll keep you posted :-)
20th Sep 2017 4:00am
20th Sep 2017 4:06am
3 little pigs snow white sleeping beauty red riding hood can you think of any more?
Umm...just a few possible suggestions: "Cinderella", Jack and the Bean Stalk"....or how about "Hanzel and Grettle", or "Goldilocks and the Three Bears" could prove quite interesting......when retold from your POV.... Hee! Hee! Or..."The Three Billy Goats Gruff???"
Anonymous
19th Sep 2017 6:12pm
Holy cats! You have a serious gift for these, I swear! I'm laughing so hard my sides hurt! I think I'm even learning some I'd never heard before...mundane or spicy versions. You crack me up! So many giggling wiggly hugs! :)
20th Sep 2017 3:39am
I always get a kick out of making you giggle thank you - Big Huge Hugs :-)
19th Sep 2017 6:16pm
"Humpty Dumpty wiggled his ass
Humpty Dumpty farted out gas
All the king's horses and all the King's men
fucked his ass again and again."
damn it David this is fucking clever & hilarious as hell..
love & hugs Brenda
Humpty Dumpty farted out gas
All the king's horses and all the King's men
fucked his ass again and again."
damn it David this is fucking clever & hilarious as hell..
love & hugs Brenda
20th Sep 2017 3:40am
Humpty dumpty should stop humptying and dumptying :-) Huge massive hugs :-)
19th Sep 2017 7:16pm
20th Sep 2017 3:45am
i wish they will start a sexy nursery class
and u and ur gf will be asked
to display
well what not
and yes i like urs
'''''....again and again.......'' my name
and u and ur gf will be asked
to display
well what not
and yes i like urs
'''''....again and again.......'' my name
20th Sep 2017 3:46am
thank you much - I am glad you enjoyed them :-) I never display in public :-)
20th Sep 2017 5:50pm
Anonymous
20th Sep 2017 1:04am
David the funniest thing for me is more than half these nursery rhymes I have forgotten about....and then I have that aha moment with your help! I will never get bored of these! How many more nursery rhymes do you think are out there hiding?
xoxo Taryn
xoxo Taryn
20th Sep 2017 3:48am
running out of Nursery rhymes - maybe childrens classic stories next? :-) I am glad you like them :-) Huge big Hugs :-)
20th Sep 2017 3:41am
20th Sep 2017 3:49am
Cool - I am so glad you enjoyed - you missed the first 5 sets (lol) if you're bored one day go and read the rest :-) thank you :-)
Laughing, and gasping...and literally spraying ice tea everywhere! i really should know better, by now, than to read a n y of your (in) famous, naughty nursery rhymes, while sipping liquids! (LOL!!) And, of course, these sent me--straight away--into belly-busting fits of uncontrollable laughter! ( I hope you know, that now, i will never be able to sing "Lavender Blue", as a lullaby...would be giggling so hard, i would be keeping the kids awake!)
David...you have become the master crafter of these delightfully "dirty" little versus! i am simply in awe of your creative talent! Admittedly, i will be sad when the time comes, that you will no longer have any more "Nursery Crimes" to share!
But, before you put your pen to rest on these pieces, maybe you would consider writing one about Mary's supposedly "innocent" cousin, 'Little Bo Peep'? ( i always wondered what a c t u a l l y caused all her sheep to become lost...) And what about the "Crook`ed Man" ? I am sure, that you could even manage to re-tell the tale of Jack, and the house he built, in such a way as to keep me infinitely laughing!
Anyhow....thanks again for bringing such welcome grins, giggles, and "out-loud" smiling, into my realm! Heaps of happy hugs your way, mo chara!!
David...you have become the master crafter of these delightfully "dirty" little versus! i am simply in awe of your creative talent! Admittedly, i will be sad when the time comes, that you will no longer have any more "Nursery Crimes" to share!
But, before you put your pen to rest on these pieces, maybe you would consider writing one about Mary's supposedly "innocent" cousin, 'Little Bo Peep'? ( i always wondered what a c t u a l l y caused all her sheep to become lost...) And what about the "Crook`ed Man" ? I am sure, that you could even manage to re-tell the tale of Jack, and the house he built, in such a way as to keep me infinitely laughing!
Anyhow....thanks again for bringing such welcome grins, giggles, and "out-loud" smiling, into my realm! Heaps of happy hugs your way, mo chara!!
24th Sep 2017 4:41pm
it's always great to make you laugh and funnily enough I am working oh "The Brothel that Jack built" - and "Little whore peep" has already been titled :-) the book is coming :-) Huge Big Hugs :-)
21st Sep 2017 4:02am
Great job & the laugh came at a good time. I love reading these over & over again. Keep up the good work
24th Sep 2017 4:43pm
if you keep laughing I'll keep writing :-) hopefully their will be a book soon :-) thank you :-)
24th Sep 2017 6:37am
24th Sep 2017 4:45pm
as long as you enjoyed them I am happy :-) there is another 5 sets already on my list, feel free to go back and read them too - Thank you much :-)
