deepundergroundpoetry.com
you can't always be up kid
i feel down
lower than a cum stain
underneath a whore's ass
they say you can't always be up
but damn it
if it doesn't sting
when you touch the sky
just to come crashing down
fuck I'm raw
my emotions so flat
they don't even cast a shadow
somewhere along the line
my voices stopped talking to me
at least they were entertaining
see you thought it was me talking
all this time i was merely a channel
that my demons ranted through
they've all left
took their ideas with them
to hell with the powers that be
for deserting me
leaving me in a voiceless void
i want to kill
though they're phantoms
that can't be touched
by mortals like me
so i fade
one lost word at a time
metaphors that once clothed me
have left me naked
shivering in a sun too bright
I'm a creature of the night
my reality is much more boring
than the fantasy i portray
once i shone bright
the stars don't cast
their light on me these days
my days of beauty have passed
this is the last look at truth
i will give you
I'm much more comfortable
in the shallow end
my little tide pool
of creative deception
the last fifteen years
have been hell on me
in that time my madness howled
then saw me in the crazy house
to crash into the
mind numbing restraints
of psych meds
so if you desire this lady
she doesn't exist anymore
& no you can't always be up kid
*picture of me 2002
Copyright © 2017 Crimsin. All Rights Reserved
All writing remains the property of the author. Don't use it for any purpose without their permission.
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Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 12:10pm
Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 9:41am
so much sadness, Crim,
& emotion;
it's a beautiful gypsy look in the photo...
& emotion;
it's a beautiful gypsy look in the photo...
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 12:10pm
Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 10:47am
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 12:11pm
Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 10:57am
Shit lately especially I've wondered if I've ever truly even been UP...you destroyed me. With that opening..."lower than a cum stain underneath a whore's ass..." That's pretty dark n raw...
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 12:12pm
thank you Poe I watched your video you've been up my friend stay there :) love Crim
Re. you can't always be up kid
Anonymous
- Edited 30th Aug 2017 2:12pm
30th Aug 2017 2:11pm
Youre so beautiful and the your statement is.a "keep living sooner or later ..truth..
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 2:18pm
Re. you can't always be up kid
Anonymous
30th Aug 2017 2:34pm
My beautiful one, I read those words you graced us with and all I see is a beautiful soul in pain, whose words have not left her, she simply cannot feel them right now. I know the feel of some of these words, though only you can truly know the weight of them all. I would help carry it if I could. I do so love you, my beautiful Dark Angel
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 2:41pm
thank you lovely one you always bring me up with your beautiful compassion.. you want your demons to vacate I want mine to come back.. love you lady.. Crim
Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 5:05pm
I totally agree with the title - but it saddens me to know your struggle. I really like who you are, a lot. I have no doubts I will like the person you may be becoming :-)
Big Warm Tartan Hugs on their way :-)
Big Warm Tartan Hugs on their way :-)
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 6:38pm
thank you David no worries some days are good some bad like with everyone.. love & hugs.. Brenda
Re. you can't always be up kid
30th Aug 2017 8:49pm
I find you not guilty of creative deception, Lady Crim. You're one of a kind, a true original seems to me, one with devastating power and honesty. I feel I know you better having read this. It's an honor...
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
thank you dearest Sir Crow I live sometimes in the creative fantasy that I make up reality at times is too harsh.. love Crim
Re. you can't always be up kid
Anonymous
31st Aug 2017 2:22am
My Beautiful Brenda, you are a woman of many facets...this is yet another one...one who looks at her others and feels she is lost, unable to see one of the others...my love...the truth is your facets have light which are too large to pin down...they ricochet off too many things at one time, passing by your beautiful eyes so quickly you believe they are not there...but they are...just look at these words...through your words, you, all you are is ALWAYS found....
I love you madly, deeply
your always & forever
xoxo Taryn
I love you madly, deeply
your always & forever
xoxo Taryn
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
31st Aug 2017 3:00am
thank you my love for letting me view myself through your eyes.. you always reflect beauty to the point I can just see it.. you are a cherished woman & important part of my life.. I love you passionately.. love Brenda
Re. you can't always be up kid
31st Aug 2017 6:49pm
i get this... being prone to emotional extremes happens to those of us who have to be hard to protect ourselves
xx
feel you bon deep, beautiful one
love you heaps
xx
feel you bon deep, beautiful one
love you heaps
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
31st Aug 2017 8:28pm
thank you beautiful one for feeling me on this write.. we do put on a hard front just to face the world.. love you lady.. love Brenda
Anonymous
- Edited 14th Oct 2018 4:47am
31st Aug 2017 7:03pm
<< post removed >>
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
31st Aug 2017 8:29pm
thank you Dani just when I think i've made peace with mine they bite me in the ass.. wishing your some peace with your's lovely lady.. love Brenda
Re. you can't always be up kid
5th Sep 2017 10:34pm
Brenda.. you speak with such conviction.. always telling it like you see it.. walking like you talk it.. you're the most brilliant poetess, i've ever known.. you share with us readers, all the pain.. the glory of the highs, and lows.. and hold nothing back.. i'm always in awe of you.. i've learned, and still continue to learn from you.. honored to call you my sister, and one of my most dearest friends.. i love you always, and so glad to be a part of your life.. by the way the pic, reminds me of a cross between a "Gypsy" and a "Gold Dust Woman".. both are my favorite Stevie Nicks songs.. love you..
Dave
Dave
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
6th Sep 2017 00:57am
thank you Dave you are so kind to me & show so much love.. you touched my heart with your take on my poetry you are very talented & I've enjoyed getting to know you over the years through our writes as well as chats.. so happy to have you to journey with as dear friends.. love you my brother.. Brenda
Re. you can't always be up kid
3rd Sep 2018 1:43am
Your honesty hurts and inspires at once, which makes it all the more brave. Not surprised to put your heart on the line in every sense. Your sharing spirit does you so much credit
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
3rd Sep 2018 1:57am
thank you dearest Taurus for feeling me on this one... this one is full of difficult truths 💕
love Brenda
love Brenda
Re. you can't always be up kid
19th Feb 2019 00:19am
As poets we are prisoners of our truth whenever we write. The best show their power and their weaknesses to the world. Your ability to share such deep introspection is what makes you such a great poetess.
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
19th Feb 2019 00:29am
thank you dearest Chris for the love here I try and write whatever is on my mind to write no matter what or how painful...it can be humbling having it look back at you in black and white...
love Brenda 💕
love Brenda 💕
Re. you can't always be up kid
Blessed soul write ... up down left right ... north south east west ... full instead of empty ... what if one could reverse all at will ... we may have to learn to write and read backwards and turned all around ... soul ... stick to soul in this ... Bless and love ... as always ...
1
Re: Re. you can't always be up kid
19th Feb 2019 1:17am
thank you graciously dearest FeNyX for the love on this write and for the advice...
love Brenda 🌹
love Brenda 🌹