To the Lover Who Disrespected Me

You said if I intended to hurt you, that showed my character.  
 
I think what shows my character is my amount of devotion to those that I care about. That includes compliments, which many I gave you, even if they are not true. As well as my time, money, intellect, and love. (Including that time I drove you to your place when you were drunk. I went there the Sunday night.)
 
I met you in a time of deep hardship. And was honest with you. As honest as I could be. After a while, which I realize is naive of me, I began to believe we have a connection.  
 
When I look back, I remember the times you would pick me up from carrs when I would meet you. It was winter and often I had on skimpy clothes (thanks to you). When you dropped me off I would have to wait in my car for it to warm up, and to dethaw, before I could drive. It occurred to me later on, after you told me I could park close by and walk, what a mean thing that is.  
 
I put myself out there to you and gave you what I could, what I had left at that time. Growing up the way I did, I should have realized what kind of person you are way ahead of time. The men I've slept with so far, all of which I had feelings for, remind me of my dad. Your role is the part where I beg and plead for you attention, which I'll never get. Only if I do what I know to do. (Which is make myself your whore.)
 
I think what shows your character is the fact that you're 10 years older than me and still in a place where you abuse women. Whether you want to admit and accept it or not, that's what you did to me. You abused my trust, affection, and my mind.
 
I enjoyed spending time with you. And was looking for guidance in the realm of kink. As well as honesty and respect, which I haven't gotten.  
 
I needed your support after seeing my dad again. And all you wanted was a piece of ass. I could not believe you weren't there for me. It broke my heart. Especially after your dad passed. Which at this point is question is true.
 
I think that's cruel. And shows what kind of man you are, or lack thereof. What your character shows me is that you're a lowlife liar, perhaps an alcoholic (I smelled the beer on you last time we hung out), a cheat (because cheaters manipulate to get what they want), and an all together piece of shit.  
 
So, thank you. I appreciate your guidance in showing me what kind of character I don't want in a man. I applaud you. If I wasn't in such a low place, I wouldn't have bottom fed to find you. I wouldn't have wasted my time on a child. And I damn sure wouldn't have ever in my life confessed any love for you.  
 
I will never open my arms or heart again to anybody who does not want it. I wouldn't wish this kind of hurt on anybody, but maybe you should get a taste of your own medicine. I think you will.
 
Take that drink that you like to litter around with your filthy self and drown yourself in it. You're dead to me.