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I never cry

 
I never cried when my mother died
Or at least not so you’d notice
Wood, brass and bouquets of flowers
Organ recitals, squalid rain showers
Burials are difficult you imagine the box
But what’s actually inside the box
Is not what you truly remember
Rose glasses see, even through dirt
The dirt reflects the glint of the rain
And stirs the few happy memories
But they were rare and you were you
And my sweet melancholy dissipates
One or two tears escape closed eyes
Then ire and rage overtake what’s left
And standing stalk still in the squalid rain
A child who had no mother to speak of
A child with unanswered wishes and prayers
That still could not be adequately resolved
A sign of the cross with fingers crossed
So the blessing won’t be real
And god in his mercy will not heed

I never cried when my father died
Or at least not so you’d notice
Wood and brass no bouquets of flowers
Organ recitals and thunderclap showers
This cremation meant nothing at all
Even through closed eyes not a single tear
Whatever happened to promised karma
Whatever happened to poetic justice
This death is just not good enough
Not real satisfaction seriously felt
Rose glasses fail to see anything
There is only fire and smoke
There are no happy memories
There was no love, no peace
With you there was no salvation
Not even in your pathetic demise
I can still smell your unique alcohol
Still feel the burn and the sting
No guilt do I feel, I don’t owe you a thing
You’re dead and I am oh so glad
Your suffering was not enough
If there is a god and there is a hell
Your torture will be eternal
That’s what makes me smile
Written by David_Macleod (14397816)
Published
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