Please Hate Me

If you hate me than I can pass
remove myself from this world
step away from this trail
to find peace in your bitterness

you'd ask why this is my wish
seeking what most men avoid
I'd say that shame will cover me
it's best for all to look away

disappointment would my friend
the companion to betrayals felt
good riddance to the bad they'll say
no more is needed when low is pegged

so please despise this crippled soul
no longer part of your vibrant realm
now with those of fallen brand
better gone than breathing air

the monster vanquished would be the cheer
to a quiet place I could then retire
what little energy the living gave
would be to spit before they left

around the pit none shall stand
reviled, forgotten, cast outside
an occupant wishing none
of the pity or of the love

this last stanza will explain
about the hatred felt within
for the self better expunged
gone at least, goodbye all.

© 2017. Sean Green. All Rights Reserved. 20170422.

I’m feeling better, and want to share this insight when the referenced emotions are not being felt.  I had a tremendously difficult week.   Spirits were rock bottom, to the point that I went to a dance and did not dance at all (except with that one person who really insisted… thank you Taylor, you’re the best!!!).  I was ready “to go”.  The bit I want to share is that depression can really really want to be alone, and for some terribly bad reasons.  It can go to great lengths to ensure this, transcending to depths that most people could not understand. The poem “Please Hate Me” was written during a time when depression was there.