Perpetually

They said the fix was permanent
it did not match the ill at hand
I'd disagree based on the years
that the ill has persevered

the battle waged on many fronts
each as dire as the other one
all while the bugle plays its song
a dirge to mark the victories won

each day a journey between to posts
with brief glimpses beyond the pain
not enough to make it all worth while
yet still I strive to make something

along the way there are unfinished works
time and energy had been misspent
while treading above the water's edge
and not slipping below to an end

at long last these monuments
surround the road that all must walk
I'll choose to take to the road now
no longer wishing to fight for my life

still the critics evoke the refrain
"temporary problems, permanent horror"
I shake my head and wonder if
they've experienced same perpetually.

© 2017. Sean Green. All Rights Reserved. 20170410.

Trigger warning… uber-dark.  A compassionate person reminded me, “Suicide is a permanent answer to a temporary condition”.    This saying doesn’t always help when the depression is neurotic, and suicidal ideation sets in for about the same period of time, a person feels like the condition is permanent, asking for a permanent solution.   The poem “Perpetually” attempts to convey this condition.