Aviation

I read the writings on the wall, literally.  
 
It broke my heart, and made me cry. No, I broke my own heart while gazing at you in a way that I shouldn't have. Now, I'm torn because I tremble at the thought of never holding you, never kissing you, and never tasting the essence of you as your warm breath trails my flesh.  
 
I've already crossed the point of no return.  
 
It should have read "You ARE my everything !" as opposed to "You WERE my everything !" but I guess that's just me being pedantic about semantics.  
 
Just for the record, you were my everything too. You're still in my dreams but we both know that you can't be a one woman man.  
 
It made me cry, and for the life of me, I dunno why I didn't show you what was in my heart, instead of aborting the precious feelings that emerged, as they flourished.  
 
Reading those words made me cry because you're right, you were... just a friend, and we weren't lovers.  
 
Even though I loved you like the latter, there was nothing but everything going on between us. It saddens me that I have take a step back from your energy as it pulls me right into you.  
 
I feel safe nestled inside your gorgeous heart.  
 
Ever since our paths crossed, my feelings have grown like wildfire, and I guess you weren't to know that, to know that I loved you, like that.  
 
I still do but I'm tired of lying in bed late at night, wondering where you are, and what you're doing, and who you're with, and then waking up to the empty spaces beneath my sheets.  
 
Life, is too short, and if we were meant to be together as lovers, then you'd be here with me. There'd be no hesitations, there'd be no reason why we couldn't be together.  
 
But. There is, and we both know that that's the way it is.  
 
If there's one thing I want you to know, it'd be... that I forgive you, deep down I do. So, please stop beating yourself up over the sufferance I felt.  
   
I know that that behavior is not who you are. Well. That's what you wrote, and I believe that to be the truth, and nothing but the whole truth.  
 
Truth be told, I'm reeling over the writings on the wall.  
 
Sounds crazy, I know... but I want you to know that I read it, and that I love you.  
 
I'll always love you, and I forgive you but I just can't be around you ! It hurts too much.  
 
And.  
 
I just can't trust myself around you because I want you, even though it feels like you're still pulsating through my veins, I need to keep far far away from the possibility of falling into the ditch that we fell in, before.

Once bitten, twice shy.