My Chosen Path

Why would I ever consider forgiving
Those who have done the unforgivable
Those who show no remorse
For the evil they have done
Who sit back and laugh
Like cackling black crows
Do those who have done the unspeakable
Need to hear forgiveness spoken
Or is that just further abuse
Do they get off on the weakness
That forgiveness surely is
I choose not to forgive
I choose to hate instead
Closure takes many forms
My closure does not lie in my given forgiveness
It more likely lies in their slow painful death
I am not in agreement with my therapist
She can forgive them if she chooses
The filthy, guilty men of the cloth
The protectors of paedophiles
Also say I must forgive
It is what Jesus would do
I was never as nice as Jesus
So fuck Jesus and fuck them
I’m in love with my rage
She keeps we warm at night
She warmly hugs my cold, dead heart
She reminds me that I am alive
She speaks to me of righteous hate
She sings to me songs of revenge
I happily wallow in this mire of ire
In a certain kind of happy place
Where they all get tortured
And their deaths take an age
And they plead like a child
To die like a scolded dog
And I easily say “no, hell no.
This time; you are my victim”
Feel the burn
Experience the fear
No pain. No gain
Remember; it’s a secret
Tell nobody or else
The same now applies to you
Nobody will answer your prayers
No one will come to your rescue
I am your God, I am an angry god
A God of vengeance
A God of punishment
The God of your damnation
I will quash your crisis of faith
I will solve your eternal doubts
I am the denier of your God
Your forgiveness, your salvation
You now belong to me
And you will know my horror
You will experience the abuse
That you feared for yourself
But would visit on a child
Your suffering will be my life’s work
Your suffering will be my pleasure
Your suffering will be endless