Self psyciatric revaluation

Lost in sentences between ...  
psychopathy and sobriety  
Renunciation and reinforcement  
Adversity and convenience  
Narcissism and self-hatred...  
........  
The need to satisfy others.  
The agony to keep them close...and if you can't  
self blame is suppressed in the unconscious  
Like the one you haven't let go since your childhood  
Obsessed with everything  
Like they have never been with you..  
And now  
every relationship is sabotaged by your own insecurities  
projecting anger, egoism and dominance with excuses, attacks and expectations.  
Not because of guilt and sadness .. 'Oh, I'm not good enough to be loved.."  
Rather cause of your need of approval  
that needs constantly vital feeding  
to keep you alive
and your bloods run in its vampire tunnels  
so you can feel worthy  
and hide the disbelief you have in yourself  
at least till the validation is evanesced..  
This is more selfish than you allow to be seen...  
 
 
My dear empath  
Until now many actions were occurred in order to maintain this illusion ."I am a poor, unfortunate, kind being ...cursed and blessed"  
What's swept under the carpet?  
What is it you cover up within the gloom of your shadows?  
Victimizer and victim  
reside in the same person and severely  
they both constitute  
you  
and you swift from one to the other  
as with all  
Manipulation of what you can sense in others..what they need, want or wish..  
and please them for your personal satisfaction  
under the surface of what appears to be the emotion  
isn't that the dark side of your empathy?  
 
We all know shit.  
And learning so many different things every day..  
We still know shit.  
 
Yes, you are aware some of your fears  
Although, the ones you don't acknowledge scare you more  
All fears are phony  
They shouldn't be there or accompany scary feelings and scenarios of terror  
They should come as simple warnings  
as instinctive instant thoughts of protection  
Rejection to the unstable dialogues of paranoia shaped mind  
Rejected already is he who can't accept thyself  
and always be until he sees  
his higher self  
that never can be discarded  
for its a perfect creation  
as all  
by all