Beach Party

i think grammatically 'meet' should be 'meets', and if i'm truly honest, i would change the first little verse to the sound meeting a 'glow of candles' because it seems to fit better somehow as abstracts meeting instead of an abstract meeting a concrete. but either way, i love the atmosphere you've created with this work so easily, and that pulling then falling away.. reading list. [:

D'oh! missed it! thanks for pointing out.
I appreciate for the suggestion i will change it immediately!
Many many thanks for adding it to your reading list sweetie :))

hi opheliac.
i would agree with jesta about the first verse.

i wonder if i could be so bold as to suggest a sound for the waves: crashing,falling,dancing, depending on the mood you are setting.

never the less,it is as per a wonderful read.

shine on!!

i quite fancy your suggesting to be honest but i prefer to keep it simple and leave it to the reader's imagination of how the waves were sounding.
thanks for commenting and liking my poem :)

I like the way you had it...the reader got to imagine certain parts

lovely!

You are such a sweet wordsmith Ophie...and I am glad that the title brings an intense meaning to the script, great selection.

this is where Anando comes in

your garb of simplicity
is far far too intense

I do sincerely hope
you have come in terms
with life

all the best